Tag Archives: Respect

Point Blank

Point Blank Meme The Manao Blog

Sometimes we need to be point blank with others, not only so that we can get things done, but more, so that not only they know what are our boundaries, but more, so that we will know and respect what boundaries we have set that others need to respect.

If there is a lesson that we should all be happy to learn, even if it hurts us to learn it, it is a lesson in respecting other peoples’ boundaries.

Now, I am not saying that making friends online is a bad thing, because I have a whole LOT of friends who I see online more than I do in the real, and of course, as we all do, I have PLENTY of online pals, too. Make no mistake, the connections we make online are as real as any connection we make with anyone at all in the real. To think otherwise is to try too hard to want to believe anything other than this one truth.

This one truth is something that a whole lot of people do not seem to get, that there are people who willingly are our friends, and that is where it stops, that is where it will always stop, and that is not a line that anyone needs to or should cross. Crossing it bleeds of disrespect, not only for another person’s privacy, but more, for who they really are.

We can push and prod and try hard to change this, this fact that what we want with anyone else is fine and good, but in terms of wanting more than we can have, and to push the issue further only shows another person that the one thing that we do not have, due to our own feeling of need or want or whatever, that the respect they are receiving that any and all humans should receive is not something that is being honored.

Honor is something that not a whole lot of people, sadly, know a thing about. To honor someone is to make it known by them and to them that who they are means something to anyone at all, but mostly, respecting who they are and everything that they need is the one thing that not too many people seem to have any regard for. I get it when we are in that thought that we have to…HAVE GOT TO…know someone, and I get it in terms of our own thinking that the message we are getting from a mere picture is something that ought to be taken as the truth.

Out truth and what it is that we want to believe may well be not what is the actual truth of another person.

For instance

Think about someone who is way interested in another person, but that other person has relayed to them that friends is all they will ever be. The person who does not accept this as their truth is not wrong in feeling as they do, but, when said person pushes and pushes, even as the person of interest has declined, this is when even the nicest “pushing” from that person is going to start becoming a problem.

It will become a problem not only for the person of interest (because they would have to continually repeat themselves with no promise that the person in pursuit of them will stop), but more, it will cause the person pursuing to try harder, and when we try harder and already know what the answer is…let’s just say that madness WILL set in.

Pushing anyone for anything is like telling them that what is their truth is not a good enough reason for anyone to just knock their crap off. Most sane human beings will take the hint and simply either deal with what is someone else’s truth, or, they will, as I just mentioned, continue trying hard to change someone else’s truth.

Trying hard to change what is anyone else’s truth is not an easy thing to do. Trying to make someone else see things through your eyes and from your perspective does no one any good at all if there is not that thing called respect. Pursuing anything or anyone at all who has already set the ground rules for any sort of relationship of any kind and that you might have just chosen to not think about what you are doing to that other person is not cool.

Where am I going with this?

Lately, and because I am trying to expand my network to include people who can help me, and I, them, no matter how big or small that help might be, I am running into a whole lot of those folks who seem to think that somehow they have a connection with me in terms of…ugh…we shall call it whatever it is that could also be thought of as being somehow an invitation for more than what it is that is there, that has been presented and that is the very truth of me and everything that I am really all about.

There are VERY few people on this planet who know, for real, who I am and what I am really about. Those few people know, very well, what my boundaries are, and with those few people, there seems, really, to be almost no boundaries. There is nothing that I will not do and that which is within my own power for each of them. They each and all know who they are. In terms of knowing who I am and what I am all about, they get it.

They understand that in order to be a part of my soul tribe, that as much as I respect their boundaries, they’ve gotta respect mine (and they do…Goddess bless each and every one of them for doing so…I Love you guys…thanks). It is not something that I have had to repeat to them, not something that was not understood by them and by me, and not something that is ever an issue that cannot be seen to in the manner that, should those boundaries be crossed, is done with love and regard for all of who I am…and it is very vice-versa with the each of them.

Then there are those ones who are brand new…the sort who want to tell me all these things so that I might well be impressed by the idea that on their end, there is some sort of connection that they have had with my picture. A picture is one thing, but to have a connection with anyone at all requires time, requires patience, requires love of the self, requires respect on a level that is not out loud, but assumed and presumed is just there. It also requires the ability to accept that which we might not like or want to hear, even as what we will hear is that other person’s truth.

That other person’s truth

When a person tells us something, it is up to us to get the hint.

Period.

If we are not willing to hear what they have to say to us, and we are not willing to take from them what is their truth and we are more willing to only see what is our own truth, and we continue to push and push for something that we know we cannot have (but yet we will continue to push) we can guarantee that eventually, and sooner than later, the pushing that we do WILL push back at us, and we might not be able to deal with the emotional after-effects caused by the things that we KNEW better than to continue doing.

Yet, continue doing as they will, they will do, and there are only a few things that we can do to make it known to them that we mean business, that they continually step over the line with us.

Perhaps it is that they cannot help themselves – human beings are like that. When we see something that we feel like we need, or we feel like there is something there that is not there, that is when we have to check ourselves, before we wreck ourselves. I mean, I get it…I totally get the idea that there are things and people in this lifetime that we would absolutely love to have in our lives. We are all like that, but, the difference between us and those who seem not able to accept our boundaries is marked.

It is marked in that all humans can sense emotional pain in others, and like all good humans will do, we want to find out what it is that we can do for anyone else in terms of helping them get through their pain, if not get out of it. You see, for us to want to help people not have a lot of pain is one thing. That is what I do for my work in this lifetime – help other people figure out ways to deal with their emotional pain and turn that emotional pain into a work of art, sometimes literally.

Sometimes, those who we would like to help only have one thing on their mind, and that one thing is simply to get us to change our mind about something that we might not be humanly able to do. I deal with this one everyday. I deal with people who just seem unable to accept the idea that whatever it is that is in their own heads and may well be a lovely thought, might not be what is in anyone else’s head and might not be that same lovely thought.

When we have bothered to take other people for their word and their word being that thing called “their truth,” is when we are ready to face other, more beautiful truths, and truths that we might not well have been able to deal with accepting for a long time, even though for a long time we knew that what we were seeing in front of us was the very truth of another person.

It is not now, nor has it ever been, neither will it EVER be anyone else’s business to try to stop us from having what is our own truth, and neither will it be one of those things that is acceptable to me, to anyone like me, to anyone period, to feel like that truth is not something that is accepted as well as respected by others.

Not accepting the truth of other people, namely when that truth is something that they hold near and dear to themselves, is like telling them that we think their truth sucks, and it sucks because we don’t like it.

Just because we don’t like it, it does not mean that we have the right to try to manipulate them to see things our way. It does not give us the right to plead our case to them, hoping they will understand why we do not share the same way of feeling our energy, but all the while, underneath it all, there is always that energy that tells us that what it is that we are feeling at any given time is somehow us lying to ourselves.

Ummm…whatever…keep on thinkin’ that way, cupcakes, and you are going to find out the business end of someone else that might not be the thing that you thought it was…seriously…

This is what happens when we decide that we do not want to accept another person’s truth about anything, but namely about ourselves and our place or our lack of place in their lives.

There is nothing more maddening for anyone, namely a light worker, than to have to repeat ourselves, over and over again. In terms of light workers, it is that we know, for real, whether you believe me or not, what the underlying motives are in anyone else (kinda cool how we sense energy like that, right? Riiiiight) If we are employed ‘in the realms’ like I am, and we are able to feel and sense our way through another person’s energy, we will try hard to not offend them but…make no mistake…when we are offended, the human being in us takes over the Spirit within by which we lead our very lives.

That’s when it is lights out, baby…

You can take my words as truth, or not, and it won’t matter – I will still be this me, and I will still not acknowledge a person who seems to believe that no matter what, my truth is not what I tell them that it really is. In this instance, my truth is exact, is absolute, and not now, and I must go ahead and say…IF EVER…will that truth change.

I am not one to exchange what (or WHO) is the most important to me, for anyone.

I said it…deal with it.

And I Promise you, each and all, that when I say something, I mean every word that I say. Again…there is a very small group of people on this planet who know this and understand this, because it is also the way that they roll.

If you cannot accept what is my truth, then I invite you to roll your ass on out of my awareness. I cannot get much more point blank than that, much as no one else can, either.

I promise…my truth is not going to change…for anyone…unless, of course, the person for whom it must change is me.

And that is a truth that some people are invited to simply choke down like a gallon of Nyquil on a hot day in the Mojave desert in August…

I Love You All

ROX

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A whole lot of words about Respect

Seems that there is a whole lot happening in our lives right now. Lots of things and ways of being – even people – are being removed from our lives. We are collectively in an energy of loss, but even as we have all lost so very much, the one thing that never needs to be lost is having Respect…yes, with a capital “R”

*****

It is with great pleasure that today I am writing, once again, about a subject that, in my opinion, is something that truly and actually NEEDS to be taught. Indeed, that one thing that I am writing about is Respect (with a capital “R”).

When I was a kid, I recall the adults in my life having a favorite phrase that I know they also heard when they were kids, and that phrase is “I COMMAND RESPECT.” Well, let me allow you this much – we all do, but, the thing is, commanding is like demanding, with the latter of the two being less…demeaning…to the person or people who anyone who would do either of these things.

I get it – when it comes to our kids, we have to “command” this Respect out of them when they are very young, and the way that we are supposed to and should be doing that is through showing these tiny little heathens the respect that we are commanding. The reason that I am writing about this particular thing, again, for probably the millionth time is because, in short, when you have to give respect where none has been given in equal measure, it is no longer a thing about having a mutual respect, but more and only about someone expecting any one of us getting what they feel they are due, simply because they happen to hold a power position in the lives of others. The worst offenders of this uneven energy are indeed parents. (Yup… I said it so eat it all up and freakin’ deal with it, guys….I gots me a big ol’ thing to write today….go get yourself a drink and whatever else you’re gonna need)

What are you teaching others about this energy called Respect?

I have written a lot about this, because the truth is that where I come from in terms of people, it is nothing for the “adults” in the lives of children to expect to get from those children the thing that they should get, but do so without returning it. I wonder what it is that compels any human person to think that they are due something that they themselves refuse to give? It might be that these people have respect confused with bullying others into fearing them and gaining respect that way. Way to go, douche-bag – and welcome to the world where in reality, what you send out in terms of energy is what you will get back, no matter what.

If you are not sending out that energy of respect, a respect that is true, that is real, the people who you are commanding it from are going to be on to you, and while you might have the upper hand right now, wait…WAIT til it comes to the  point where they have had enough of your garbage and the tables turn on you. I am not saying that they are going do to you what you have done to them. What I am saying is that, eventually, you will push people out of your life, because you do not know what the hell respect is for real.

And then…you expect the people who you hurt the most to want to stick around and be there for you. I have news for you – it is probably not going to happen. You might have been able to bully them into believing things that you wanted to believe yourself, but the bottom line is that the more that you continue to chip away at what Stephen R. Covey stated in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, as being an “emotional bank account” that, at the end of it all, is in the red where this is concerned regarding respect.

And really, Mr. Covey was right – it is true that if a person will continue to do the things that causes another person or people to be repulsed and repelled by them, there is a guarantee that somewhere along the way to that place where there is no love left, at least the sort that makes people want to be around a person, there was a very dear and severe lack of true respect.

Respect is NOT something that we can buy, and if what anyone will do in the manner of paying with tangible means (i.e. buying nice things for people who you know dislike you just so that they will like you and other quite douche-bag like things) for the “respect” of others, this is not respect – this is what is called buying people. If you have to buy the respect of others, have to barter things and have to impress people with tangible means, and in reality you know that these people, given the fact that you probably were capping on them all the time, have very little respect for you. If you are the kind of person who has to barter things and money and essentially are the person who lives from the ego instead of the soul, you need dearly to check yourself before you further wreck yourself.

You see, people do not like being lied to, do not like being taken for a fool, do not like being belittled, do not like paying for someone else’s old sins from the past over and over again until you, the one who needs to command respect, finally wear them down to the point where when they see you coming, they turn tail and head the other direction away from you, it is not the others who need to deal with things of a personal and internal soul matter. What you seek from others you must have within you and for you. This is not new. This is something that has a lot to do with the energies that combine and bring out who you truly are through outer means that are outside of your control. And in reality, you are what is that thing called a control freak.

You do not need to control people to have their respect – all you need to do is show some true respect for others and that energy will be given back to you. Try it and see for yourself. There is no need for bravado, because that is just another form of disrespect called arrogance. There is no need for name calling, because what you are emitting in terms of energy is your own feelings about yourself in some manner. What is needed is the paring down of your own self to get to the core of who you are and finding out what it is within you that is making you so very dearly repulsive to others. Have you ever noticed that? The next time that you are at a party…doesn’t matter if it is a company party or a family party – take a few moments to observe everyone’s body language and notice their mannerisms. There is nothing that hides an arrogant fool, just exactly like there is nothing that can hide the light that shines through a person and out to the people who they are with.

Respect is not something that should not be present upon meetings between strangers. The respect begins to be lost when said strangers start to size each other up and begin to take what the other person is saying as somehow being demeaning to them. Sometimes, it is totally demeaning and make no mistake – there are a lot of people who we share the air with who lack the sense in themselves enough to NOT behave in the manner that is boorish, that is needing all the attention from the rest of the planet, and when we come across a bully we are most assuredly encountering the energy that is disrespect.

There are no two ways about this. You either have respect for strangers, so as to exude that energy, thereby bringing it back to you, or you don’t, and you end up bringing the energy back to you as well.

If it is that you are finding yourself at odds with people, it is a good bet that you have likely shown little or no respect for them, and you end up behaving in the manner that is equivalent to a giant two year old, tantrum, foul demeanor, and everything else that it comes with. This is the thing that, for whatever reason there is, still seems so present in our lives, even as there is no reason for it at all. There is no reason for us to play “eye for an eye,” because we no longer live in the times of old. There is no need for us to think that what we have to do is command anything from anyone else. There is no need for anyone’s ego to take over and wreck things any more than they are already. This is the thing about not having respect for people – again, it is the energy and NOT the words coming out of someone’s mouth that others are sensing.

A lack of respect also denotes a real lack of integrity. When we lie to people to save their feelings, we are not respecting that maybe they were learning a soul lesson and that maybe they needed to learn the lesson at hand. When we pretend to have love for another person and that love is based on a the “servant-master” dynamic, that is not respect…it is ownership. When we are more willing to just get our way without regard to how anyone else feels about a thing or two, we are not doing what is the highest best for anyone, but namely for ourselves.

When it is that we find ourselves all alone, both outwardly and inwardly, we need to stop and ask ourselves what it is that we can do to remedy that. There is a giant in difference between being alone and being lonely. If we are lonely we need to ask why we feel that way and realize that perhaps, at some point in our lives, we took everything that was good, if indeed it could be called that, and somehow banished all of it to the wasteland called “someone else’s fault but not mine.” This is not to say that some folks are very lonely because they really want to be with people but are shy. I am talking about those types of people who run their mouths, do horrid things to others, and expect that they will still have the love of these people. It does not work that way. At all.

You see….wherever respect is concerned, there too is also Love concerned. Without a proper love of the self, one cannot love anyone else. It is impossible to know real love if you do not love you, much as it is impossible to respect one’s own self if you do not have respect for yourself. It is not our place to judge anyone else for their actions, but rather and only our place to make sure that both our words and actions have the energy that is of the highest integrity, because that is where the truth of respect for one’s own self is found.

Basically, those who show little respect for others, who care nothing about how others feel, about what affects anyone else, in the manner that is hurtful, really have a problem with self-respect, because really…who we are is reflected in the company that we keep.

…and if no one is around, what is that telling you, let alone the rest of the world?

I Love You All

ROX

ManaOShark2

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How everything old becomes new again

At this time of the year, we all look forward to changes that we exact on our own. Thing is, no one realizes why it is that we yearn for change…it isn’t just what you think it is

I like saying that when life gets messy, and when we least expect it, it is also by life that we are handed a proverbial brand new piece of paper upon which to tell our new stories. You see, life is not one long boring string of events either experienced with a collective of people versus being experienced alone. Technically, we experience life on a collective level and our experiences and our opinions of those experiences are what are different.

Think about it for a minute and let it soak into your brain. Every thing that we go through, that we know, that has happened is experienced differently by every single one of us, even though there might be a whole lot of us literally looking at the same thing, at the same time – we are all going to collectively have that same experience, but at the same time, we are not. We are not because we are different than one another, even though, again, we are not.

Yup. That really is a lot to think about, and a lot to digest given that the majority of us have gravitated toward those who are most like us. In my case, it would be other weirdos, and other artistic types, and the people who seem to be misunderstood by the majority of the whole of us.  While it is that there are people in my own tribe who are going through almost the same things that I am, at the same time, what they experience and what I experience and how we each handle those things will be different.

Yet, that is not what I am here and writing about today. Today, I wanna take those things up there and tell you about how we take what we know and do with them what we will according to what bothers us. What bothers a majority of us is that there are a lot…a LOT of old ways of being, of doing, of getting where we want to get, and no one ever questions it, ever. And why? Because we have been taught another person’s ways. This is okay, by the way, because we are not born knowing what we know – we are only born with the ability to learn what it is that we will know.

The reason that we do a lot of things is out of the respect that is not really respect.

The respect that is not really respect

I think I am over all of the painful garbage that I feel like I have relived this last year. Yet this has given me a better insight into what it is that we believe we are doing when we choose to allow the growth that we have asked for. I know that I have, more than one time, heard, out of my mother’s mouth, that in order to learn anything, in order to get through anything, in order for a lot of things, we have to allow ourselves to be patient, have to let in the hurts that we do not want to let in (okay, not in those words but you know what I am saying), that we have to face what it is that ails our souls.

While it is that I know that there are bits and pieces of wisdom in those things, they are not things that I have never known, are not things that I am not aware of and are not things that I know do not need to be acknowledged. I have always known these things. These things have been drilled into my brain since I was a kid, and these are the things that are the basic and bare minimum of what it is that we need to know if we intend to make it through our lives by the seat of our souls.

The reason I brought my mom up is because I know that there is not one person on this planet who did not listen to their mother when they were a little kid. In my case, it was the fear, literally, of her jealous God, a fabricated fear of a curse that someone else said existed…fear, basically, is what has, or used to, govern every thought, every action, every damned thing in my life. I was afraid to disrespect my parents for fear that I would get “good leekenz” and more, that God would punish me and send me to hell with a quickness. I learned to respect my elders, but only because I feared them so dearly. When I got older, I started seeing things my way, the way that I had been told would send me to spend the rest of my days at Club Hades.

Fear is what governs us, whether we want to believe it or accept it – it is what brought us to where we each are right now in our lives. If I were not scared to not be able to dance hula ever again, I would never have started the hula school I started back in 2002, in the most unlikeliest place where anyone would think it would survive, and it did survive, for almost ten years.  If I were not scared to not have friends or love in my life through my soul family, I would not make sure to it that even though I have some serious crap happening in my own life right now, that I would not tell them that I am still alive and that things will be back as they were when the time and the soul of it is all back to balanced.

Fear is the thing that many people my age were raised up with, and fear, to this day, is the thing that too many of us are blocked in our lives with. Fear is why we each have a bitch to pitch, and it is not that we are afraid to not succeed, but that we are scared to death that we are as powerful as we tell everyone else that we are…everyone, that is, but the people who raised us to be who we are in the here and the Now.  It is not that they are the problem, inherently, but that what they taught us, even though it is and always was something from Love and has always been useful, at this point, some of it no longer applies because it can’t apply.

We have been through too much and have seen and experienced too much, so much so that we have other, more meaningful memories that speak to us still, that tell us that who we are is the reason that we go through specifically what it is that we do. It is like knowing for many years who it is that we are meant to be with, and suddenly, one day, that person reappears to us, out of nowhere, it seems, and it is almost as though no time has passed. Then when we come back to reality, we realize that we are married, that we have our own kids, that we might have step-kids, a spouse, and always, what we also have is the “what if?” And it is the “what if” that really makes us think that there is no chance for anything like that again.

I beg to differ, and this is where it is that “old school” meets “new thought” by the same people who were made scared to even bother with a brand new thought – us.

When old school meets the new version of us

We know that it is time to release the old way for our own way when what we have been taught really no longer makes any kind of sense to us. While they might make perfect sense on the top of things, overall, what we used to believe (old school) might apply, but most of it will not (new thought).

It is not that those rules and ways of being are no longer valid, but that they no longer, in part or in whole, apply to who we are. Those things might apply, universally, but the mechanics of that way versus our own new way, may not meet in the middle. Think about it for a minute. Just a few hours ago I spent some time on the phone with a person who I grew up with, who means a great deal to me, and with whom I share MANY awesome familial memories. The conversation was about how it is that sometimes, the things that point us in a certain way do so in order that when the time is right for us to realize in manifest everything that we have thought about and desired in our lives we would see it.

It caused the other person to pause. I could hear it in their voice – this was really and dearly something to think about. It was not that there could not be this thing that we had talked about, at least not right at this moment, that is. It was more about the fact that nothing, not even a partnership between two people, could literally last forever. It is physically impossible. Yet, it also opened up something that this person never, at least in my own opinion and given that I have known them my entire life, really had – hope.

Before I told them what I told them, it was all about “it can’t happen,” and when I gave them my thoughts about things, that picture of “it’s never going to happen because of…” changed. What I gave to them was a new thought which was spawned by the hopelessness that I am very personally aware of that is given to things that we are taught by others and that those others want people to believe, without a shadow of a doubt and without the ability toward reasoning, something to possibly look forward to.

NOW, while I told this person what I think will happen is one thing, and I know that the way that I come to this information is not fail safe because always these messages come to me in the form of pictures, words and 80’s hair band songs (quit laughing). All the while, throughout the years, when I would think about this person with whom I had given my thoughts to, when I thought about a certain thing that pertained only to this person, I would hear a song by the Scorpions, and the only thing that would happen to my thoughts at that point, before I started really studying these gifts I have, would be that I would think that this other person just really like that band. And that much is the truth – that they liked that band.

Then, after one thing happened, recently even, that one song made a lot of sense to me and voila- I no longer hear it playing over and over in my head without knowing the reason why I hear it. I know now, and to an extent I also know that I am right on it.

If  I had chosen to stay safe in the place where I believed that these were just stupid little annoyances, and did not pay attention, not only to my own thoughts, as well as the things I have been taught by new teachers in these last 7 years, I would not be who I am, and I would not be able to do these things that I do.  And all of this came from the idea that what is old school is still valuable, but it must also include what is new for us.

It is not now, nor shall it ever be “out with the old,” but…

I will say that right now, it is high time that we each thought about implementing what we have deduced from the things we have been through, and apply it to ourselves, blending together the old school with the new thought. Really, it is the only way that we, as a species, will survive with one another and without warring over trivial things.  To believe that who we are is not subject to learning and changing, not to accommodate others, but so that we can accommodate each of our singular paths and is also the same sort of thinking that would cause a person to go crazy from that very thought.

The thought that things will never change is what makes things NOT change, but the idea that with every thing that we have, everything that we have been through, and all of the lessons that we have learned throughout the very course of our collective lives is ridiculous (on the lower end of things) and really quite dangerous (on the higher end of things) and is so because of the idea that humans are not static in that people believe the things that we tell ourselves, namely when it is that we feel like nothing is ever going to change.

And all of us KNOWS better than to think that things just will not change. It is not that we know that they won’t, but that we, as a whole, have chosen to be “safer than sorry” when it comes to the things that mean the most to us. We are sick and tired of getting our hopes up only to have them crash to the ground and in to a million tiny little pieces. The thing that not one of us thinks about when it is that we are about to go into a giant tizzy fit is that right at this very moment, things are as they are, but there are other moments that are GOING TO happen, and in those moments we can think, too, that there is more to look forward to than only what we have in our midst at the present time.

At the present time it seems that collectively we are all with the sensation of having our panties in a wad, and all of us wants dearly to pull the wedgie out already.

What we are not realizing is that maybe they really are not in a wad, and that perhaps it is that we are wearing a thong????

Duh…hahahahaaa

Kinda puts it all into perspective for you, doesn’t it?

Learn to embrace the new by never allowing the old to completely be the thing that guides you.  Take what you have been taught and add it to what you have learned.

Really, this is how EVERYTHING old becomes new again.

I Love You All !

ROX

HUI!

‘AUHEA WALE ‘ANA’OE!!

The photo depicted is the artwork of one Mr. Randy Jay Braun, also, and known and loved the world over as being “Hawai’i’s Camera Artist.”

I beg dearly to differ, because his artwork is known and loved GLOBALLY…he is EVERYONE’S Camera Artist.

The Website Address to see the rest of his gallery collection can be seen by going to www.randyjaybraun.com 

RJB_NEW_PO_AO..MEME


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