In Spades

In Spades Photo Mana'o Blog.png

 The truth of all of this madness that lots of us are experiencing is a collective energy of correction of the Soul Vs. the Ego-Self, and it is happening in spades…

You might think, like I think, a LOT lately, that somehow, the gods are having fun at our collective expense.

Over the last few months and weeks, we have witnessed the comatose nature of common sense with the ushering in of this..president elect….and we are seeing after a very long set of generations a lot of ugliness that has happened to our Native American brothers and sisters, my own Hawaiian global ohana, and, as well, the water supplies all over our nation being tampered with and, at least in my own leanings, poisoned, on purpose, because there is a guy who walks the crust of the earth believing that we humans do not have the right to water – because he wants to keep it all, bottle it all and sell it all to us in the form of “healthier” water. 

…and there is a certain set of carbon based human beings of a certain low soul-nature who believe that the things going on still at Standing Rock were not somehow all part of this horrid plan to make certain that we be sent backward in time to a place where certain people among us, myself included, become lesser than others, because of whatever it is that we are being told, but, where it is that we with darker hue skin end up having to, all over again, fight for what was ours…including the rights of indigenous peoples to our lands. To some of these people who this person is choosing, Sacred land is just real estate and NOT lands that our ancestors and our transitioned holy people – our Medicine People and our Kahuna, our Shaman, our Witches and our Sorcerers, our energy healers, light workers, our people who check the box “other,” still, when we are asked on a government form, a loan application, anything “official” about what our origins are.

Goddess help those of us who were not born here. Goddess help those of us who are of a dual-soul. Goddess help those of us not super wealthy, not a certain color of skin, not a whole lot of things…Goddess help us, even if we were born and raised in this country.

Goddess help us.

And ALL of us, even us weirdos – every single one of us is being shown things in our lives that we would rather not have to look at it, because all of it looks like massive losses, a whole lot of further desecration of our Mother Earth, loads and loads of women haters, religious zealots, entitled CEOs who are being turned into politicians, and let us not forget that children all over the world, even here in the states, are going to bed at night hungry, and yes – here in the richest country in the world…our children go to bed at night, sometimes in the car which doubles as the family home, hungry.

And people who thought they were good hearted people made it a public thing that they were not thinking about the future generations’ ability to feel safe in their own skins…YES- SKINS, namely if it is a beautiful dark hue- but only about how they might win something that truly pertains to them but in a VERY VERY far away manner.

You showed….okay MANY, MANY of you showed the world – YES..THE WORLD….the truth of who you are.

I am going to likely lose a lot of readers with this next comment, and I am okay with it, but, those of you who chose like you did also showed us who you are, for real, and if that is not the way that all of you are for real, then you voted in the heat of the moment. And here we are, all of us now, wondering why it is that there are still people defending a lying treasonous human being who publicly bullied a disabled person, who objectified women, basically spat upon the collective of poor working people whose care he left in the hands of people who would rather see them no longer in existence.

This is what I have to believe, given that I am female, that I am outspoken, that I am left-leaning but middle-ground standing, that I am, unlike MANY of my own family members, one of those …darker-hued Americans…fun stuff….none of them see ANYONE BUT ME….they do not see me as a threat to anything OTHER than the possibility that, on any given occasion, I might threaten that they can bank on seeing me in the future, and that indeed, I might bring up a fun memory from our shared kidhood…but that is all they feel threatened by me about….which really, it’s not THAT big of a deal.

I want people to know that this is what and how some of you chose  – choosing how you did and hurting people like me, a person who, while she was younger, might have wanted to go toe to toe with anyone willing to bring her harm, but who now no longer can deal with violence, with bullying, with the put down of people who might not have had a choice OTHER than to have to survive by public means. I want people to know that I was raised as a Christian, by parents who, to this day, still believe in the power of their own spiritual beliefs…and because of this, I have a very hard time thinking that those who voted for “the religious right” chose so for any other reason than their level of belief in a deity that most who knew me as a younger me who then also chose to make fun of me because I HAD to go to church…. that they felt threatened by a whole lot of things.

The one thing that you ought to have felt threatened by was just exactly how you have chosen what you have, which was only to win, which told a whole LOT of us, on some level, that not only did you believe none of us would go through what we have gone through FOREVER…you also believed that we would NOT think that your choice for this person supported not only a lying narcissist, but also a guy who actually thinks, perhaps even believes, that being publicly outed as a liar, on any level, is not only not good for the country, but, he might well find out that it is also not good for business.

Winning is only one time, specifically when you have treated something as important as the choice you each made become the biggest spectacle ever…almost like it was some sort of sporting event…this was how you – most of you – treated all of this..choosing… that you did.

I might be wrong. I hope I am. But, after having witnessed a whole lot of stupidity over these last few weeks after November 8th, 2016, I do not think I am.

What I think I am is disappointed in the idea that there are a LOT of people who know me, who know that I am NOT white, who know that I love people, even when they hurt me, and the only thing that I can do by that time is to Love them from a distance, just so that in some small manner, I do not have to hurt one more minute by them, and are people who also were not thinking about the idea that they know folks like me, swear that they love us.

They know folks like me who are not the type who goes into these things lightly, that as an Ordained Minister of the non-denominational type, as the type that is Kahuna Wahine, is Medicine Woman, is scientist geek in behavioral sciences – not one of you thought about your friends who look like me, who are female, like me, who loved you all without question or regard and in this moment, after all of the ridiculousness, the only thing that I question now is why did you NOT think about us, your minority, your female, your gay , your working class friends and family members who would be, in some manner, affected in the manner that we have been.

I hope, for real, that your boy can handle all of us, all at one time, when we decide that our patience has been worn thin by the very lot of you becoming ugly creatures in the soul, when you realize that the thing that you thought was the right thing was actually the thing that you ought to have thought about and when you punched that hole in that card, you were punching it on behalf of me, too.

I hope that, for real, and this is not all of you – there are some of you who actually ARE a person whose values are truly what the right’s are – but for real, those of you who chose not to think about your friends who are like me – not white, not male, not Christian, not YOU – and who are already feeling our own losses, because that is what you chose for us, is what you chose for me, for my budding feminist daughter, my oldest son who respects women because his mother taught him through her actions and her truths what to look for in a woman when the time comes that he is wanting to start a family of his own, my baby…my Joshua…who is spending his kid years in a culturally diverse neighborhood, being taught in one of the very best charter schools in the state, by teachers who are very liberal and very loving when they realize who they are being kind to while these kids are not in our care…


It is not that I feel slighted by this orange faced clown who people took seriously – I feel slighted, somewhat, by the idea that people who have known me for years voted for a guy who blatantly lied and still does, who keeps secrets when he is not supposed to, who picks fights with the people who he is supposed to be serving – us – whenever one of us has an issue with him or his people, rather than practicing what he is headed for doing, he attacks one of us, rather than correcting his particular people. He stole money from students. He is trying hard to keep all of his international interests, and now that the reality is here….he is not being the guy who he was when he was campaigning.

Yet, even that is not my issue.

My issue is always going to be that those who know me do not realize that choosing this person also was your choice in terms of what is actually in your soul. My issue is the idea that you might have wrongly believed that I would agree with all of the crap that we heard, would give this guy a chance or something like that, as if you would do the same in return, and that the hurtful things that your choice brought into light, the idea that you might have thought people like me would be okay with the idea that you did not think about the entirety of the whole, and possibly only by right of what color you were born as.

You might think that I am being harsh, but, I am not being harsh at all – I am being this way because for weeks, your choice has brought harm to my psyche, to my being of self in that I love you, that there is no choice that I make, when speaking in terms of who we are and how my choices affect you in every manner, which does not involve how it might affect you. How you came to the conclusion that I might, that anyone not thinking in the weak manner that you were, agree with your choice or the bullying that a lot of us who DID not choose that guy, is beyond me. I used to believe that you knew me well enough to also know that your words that are attached to your choice and mostly the truth behind your choice – this is what brought a lot of people you said you loved more harm than I thought you were capable of. Your choosing that guy, to a lot of us, meant that you no longer chose us…at all, if what you thought was we would not be harmed by it.

We were, and it was not economic, and neither was it anything political or tangible.

It was all about the truth of your soul, the truth of your feelings of low self-worth and inferiority, and the only thing that you chose with was this, masked as things that you do not like, because you refuse to learn to understand them. I must ask you each and all to go within your selves and see if you could tell a foreign child..maybe 5 or 6 years old..that you hate them because they do not believe in your god, that you despise them for existing, that you wish their parents were dead because whatever fucking stupid reason that you thought you had, when in reality, it was not a reason.

It was an excuse.

I said it.

Deal with it.

You felt bullied by the ones who were bullied – all because we were exercising our right to being the best versions of ourselves, all on our own, and we were, still are, getting better at being those best versions. Would you really call this choice showing everyone that this is the best representative version of yourselves, down deep in the bones of your soul?

Can you even answer that question without hurting one of us again or having to go through the pain of having made such a choice?

And this is how you answered that energy – by choosing with your arrogance, your ego-selves, and not with the heart that, for those who chose this way, I am hoping that deep in the bones of your souls, you are still who I have always known you to be, which is not someone with an excuse for having chosen, not in favor of people like me, but, in favor of people like the actuality of the truth of who you are and have always been…apparently.

I get it – people grow and become new, but this is not new.

This is VERY OLD THINKING…and is NOT thinking that is the manner of your own generation, because I know that you were not the people who were raised this way. Your parents did not teach you this…manner of excusing your selves from thinking about the whole, rather than your tiny, daily waning sense of your own truth in self.

I could not ever make a choice because I might feel like I am being affected by something that I have no control over, such as someone’s color of skin, or their religious beliefs, or their gender or their lifestyle…anything that is not someone’s choosing, or perhaps is something that has been theirs to embrace from a very young age, is the thing that many people were not thinking about. It doesn’t matter, will not ever matter, that I am told that I am loved by you, and while it is none of anyone’s business what anyone’s choice at all is, what I was told by your choice was….is….how you actually feel about people who you do not know anything about, about beliefs that are not in line with your personal own, about how you feel about the disabled, how you feel about women and our rights and our rights to choose what is right for our lives and our bodies….you made your choice against my only daughter, and my sister in law, my nieces, my friends.

You chose to bring back to men the right to play grab ass with us (and if you have known me for any long amount of time, then you also know that I AM NOT ONE WHO LIKES HAVING HER PERSON GRABBED- ANYWHERE). You chose to let this…very PROUD promoter of violence, in the form of rape and verbal bullying against women and all of everything beautiful about womankind…LEAD US. You chose this person who has been the thing that we have NOT condoned, this whole…arrogance that so many of you had to just …NOT SHOW THE REST OF US….you chose, with WHO you chose, to show us what your actuality is and you did so IN SPADES.

In Spades…

While you might not have thought in this manner as you poked that hole in that card stock, it was the only thing that we who work in the world of Spirit, whose goals and lives and jobs in this lifetime have everything to do with healing the soul of the planet, you were making things different and not in the right way for those like us.

Your choices are everything, and I have a lot of pals who are actual conservatives, and if those people voted how they did – that is THEIR right, and they are the very ones who are NOT poking fun at me because they assume that just because I am female, that I voted for the other person. To you guys – you know I love you, you know that I KNOW you voted in terms of what you have always believed. I would NEVER expect you guys to choose apart from your party. You know I love you. You also know that you are not who I am writing to right now….by any means….you know this. (Including and specifically, you, Coleen…stay real, lady…)

It is the rest of you, the ones – many who I grew up with – the ones who are still gloating, and choosing to still create a problem with me, for whatever reason you have..because you are actually one of those people who, in a deep seated manner, and in some small way, actually feels the way that particular majority of people who voted in that manner, voted.

Yes…I said it, so deal with it, because I know the difference between a person who is actually “party proud” and wears it, and to those people I must tip my proverbial hat, because really, I am likely one of their most, if not THE most, eccentric and liberal, albeit moderately so, friend they have and person who they know, and they have NEVER had a problem with me.

When they have corrected me and my antics, it is not because of anything MORE than that they believe that I am now behaving like the thing that they are not.

The thing that they are not is …fake.

And yes – they each and all know EXACTLY who they are, and we have a great amount of respect for each other and we always have. And why?

Because I am not worried about their ideals, their likes and dislikes, because I am not interested in their way in terms of their beliefs – they know that I know who they are, and that they are true to who they have always been.

It is the rest of you who voted because you thought you knew what was going on, who believed that the reason you chose how you did was because you felt like a fucking loser, over, of all things, your own people taking advantage of the working class (read: YOU GUYS)  and your own people who do not know what the fuck you were choosing. If you felt like a loser, and your choice made you feel like a winner, the only thing that you have “won” from me is your way out of my life.

You chose going with the crowd, the one that hates what they do not understand, and the one that doesn’t like the idea that we are a diverse populace, and the one that spent its life bullying people, just so that you would “win” by fists and your bullshit, rather than on your own brave heart…you chose effrontery, because you felt threatened, you felt belittled by us, and you had no reason to feel that way. All you felt was this essence of effulgence coming from us.

That was called, is still called pride in ourselves, because we have been who has been real, and by this I mean that at our core, we are the realest people on the planet, and you just do not like it when we are in your face with it, even though we do not even give you assholes the time of day – it does not work that way. We are who we are, and prior to this person “winning,” you were either very dearly and truly the you who I have known, who many have known…

…or, you really are this big of a fake, and not a very good one if you are trying to pass it off on me that you truly are being true to anyone at all, but rather and only to your inner self that felt so afraid of losing…

It is totally because truly, you are now and have always been a loser.

Namely if you had to choose a bully who is only choosing more bullies…who is proving to us all, right now, that he is the right leader for a small minority of people who themselves have always felt like they need to have a means by which we, the rest of the people, will be told that yes…yes, indeed not only are we going to pay for your feelings of being losers…

…that you will continue to believe that this is the right way to be, namely when you KNOW that this is NOT the real you.

My only question, for real, is how long have you been a phony, and has it been as long as I have been loyal a loyal friend to you?





About ReverendRoxie22

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