There are a whole lot of us on this planet who feel things deeper than most. We are those who seem to attract the very worst situations as well as people of the shittiest sort to our life, but for no other reason than that we are capable of dealing with things that others seem unable to.
What a statement that introduction is, right? (Right).
This typically means that this particular writing will be very…very…in some parts…VULGAR…in terms of the presentation that you each and all will be “hit” with, so to speak. And I am saying it right now, that I will make no apologies to anyone who thinks that I am speaking directly to and at them…I probably am doing exactly that.
I guess that I am sort of lucky that until now, I have had to simply deal with this last week’s harshness alone, but not. It is not a mistake that when we cannot get in touch with others within our hanai ohana, namely those who we need to reach out to and who have, in the past, reached out to us when they needed someone just to simply listen…we are being told, right then, to think about why it is that we are going through what it is that we are.
In my case, I know it has a lot to do with my …growing ability…to turn my healer’s back on people who I just cannot tolerate in terms of helping them to heal themselves. The issue, by the way, is not ours – it is theirs and they have made it ours for a long time. What a buncha SHIT !
Perhaps it is not the right way to start this writing off, because the reality is not that I need to write about more stuff that is already saturating us all the time in terms of who is, and who is not, an Empath. I know that I am an Empath. I know that those who are closest to me are also this same thing. I know that there are things that I am able to discern from what seems to be nothing, and I know that a lot of what it is that I will feel and sense will not be of the greatest, nor happiest vibration.
I know that there are people who we share the air with, and more than that, people who our daily lives are impacted by in terms of our abilities, and typically, those people are the worst people for anyone with a sharp sense of knowing, at all times, and feeling, at all times, and being very sensitive to the energies of others, most of the time, and for the most part, in the easiest language that my brain is able, at this point in time in my life as an academic, as a writer, as a human being, can conjure – people are shitty, and people do shitty things. Shitty people do shitty things.
Shitty People do Shitty Things
I was trying to clean up my language with my blogs, but what the fuck for? So people without the right to judge me for who I am, for who anyone is, can feel like they have had some modicum of control over my thoughts? Why should I not be me, and why is it that anyone at all believes that they…they who are not me, who are not others like me….who the hell is anyone else to try hard to fuck with people about who they truly are on the inside? Who is anyone to tell me that they would read what I write if I chose to not write the words “shitty,” “fuck,” “god damned,” “mother fucker,” as well as a whole host of other apparently, to some, very offensive language?
Does it occur to those who are offended by me, by my words, my anything…me who has a huge heart and a lot of soul, and me who is unconditional in her manner of being able to pinpoint what is the collective energies of the planet on any given day of the week…does it fucking occur to anyone at all that the more you tell me, or people like me, that we are offending others, or that we are offensive, period, that that alone puts YOU in the area of being an offensive prick? It makes you an offensive prick because you are telling people like me that when we are being ourselves, we are offending you, because we happen to not clean up our language for your eyes to not read. I am sorry, but if this is you, I am NOT writing this to please YOU. I am writing this because this is what Kahuna folks do – we fucking orate, and we write, and we know the god damned power of words, and to those of you who are offended by it?
Get over it -it does not occur to you that perhaps your phoniness in terms of proper behavior from other humans might be the thing that people like me are pointing out in you. It might not occur to you that people like me do like we do and say what we do, NOT because we have some sort of mental …problem….but, because we are always being called offensive, always being called and told that we are too sensitive and that we need to “suck it up, buttercup….”
How the fuck about FUCK YOU? How about knock your sorry shit off, and how about YOU just don’t fuck with sensitive people with your bullying tactics? What the fuck is wrong with me? NOT A GOD DAMNED THING…keep fucking reading…
I am not too sensitive – you are an asshole.
People like me are not in need of being told again and again that we are who is fucked up. It does not occur to others who have no intention of being anything like the person who you are supposed to be right now is trying hard to come out, and it is people like me – the ones who you bully mercilessly, and the ones who you call “paranoid,” “insane,” and “unstable,” and are the ones who literally feel your truth – the very truth you deny.
Your truth is why you bully others, and your truth is the truth that you cannot face, even as your truth is the thing that is screaming at you from those who are just like me…me who is empathetic, and me who is no longer taking anyone’s shit. Your truth is what you deny, and in response to that, you and others like you want me and others like me to deny our truths. We cannot do that. We will not do that, at least not anymore, and not for a bunch of entitled fucks who believe their own bullshit and then carry that bullshit out onto the world as though it is your fucking right to be an asshole, just because that is how you roll, and just because that happens to be the only strength you think you have.
You like to bully people, and you have turned a fucking dear weakness into a strength that is only topical – meaning that it is only on the top of things where the audience you seek can see it, where the people who you have drawn to you so that you can siphon the good energies from others through your pretend bullshit which usually comes across as you needing sympathy rather than you accepting being kicked in the face by the Goddess you seem to think does not exist and is the same Goddess that you chase your phony God or your phony …anything that you worship-usually your self – on. You are not impressive, and I am tired of your shit. I am more tired of carrying your heavy energy and made sick by the idea that you – EVERY LAST FUCKING ONE OF YOU – have this image of yourself as being the victim in all of your dramas.
Guess what? You’re right….you victimize others to feel superior, but you want to be the highest of the lowest, which is fine because that is where you belong – with those who believe the idea that in order to be good enough or strong enough, you have to have someone else who can be pointed at, who can be called the one who brought you the pain. It is not me or anyone like me who has brought these things to you. They have always been there. The thing that me and others like me actually do is bring out the worst in you so that you can see it, and you can try not to fail to it. But you always do.
It takes so little to be a thinking and feeling and a real person, but you opt for the fake because the fake allows you to fool those who trade their souls to become your follower, your henchman, your apath…and eventually even those who would be your minions fade away from your life.
The only thing that is left for those of us who are Empathetic and in this energy is the very real feeling of being no longer in the presence of people who abuse with impunity, who do not realize that they are doing it and that when they are doing it they are showing us all every bit of every thing that has happened to them and that they have denied being the truth that needs to be healed.
We are tired of your shit, guys…
I am not alone in this feeling and this energy that is screaming “hey man FUCK YOU…”
What No One Realizes…
This is what no one realizes about people with a superior sense of empathy – those who are strong empathetically can see right through the lies, right through the things that people who sense (but pass the senses off as though they are wrong) can see through, and the impossible thing about it all is that those who sense can do nothing about the fact that we not only draw those who are exactly like us to us (in the sense that is partnerships and hanai ohana= soul tribe) what we sense, and right through the bullshit that we have been fed for a very long period in our lives by those who are there for us to work through the bullshit that we have had handed to us over the course of our lives.
And again…I must defer, sort of , to how it is that we are each and all raised. I make a joke, everyday just about, on one of my social networks, regarding something that I referred to for some time as “old people theater.” It is not about old people going to the theater, but the old people who I spend much time with. While it is that I understand that these are people who grew up in a different time, where different things applied, I find most revealing the idea that the things that I hear smack loudly of the kind of upbringing they’d had.
On one end, there is the absoluteness of being a child watching one’s parent abuse the other parent.
On the other hand, there is the child who was made afraid, not only to disobey, but more, to disappoint.
Then there is me, the one who is still soothing the child within, the very one who, from the time that I was physically a child, has been mostly a witness to as well as the person being treated improperly. I cannot change others, but I can change my thoughts about what it is that has been part of my life, for the whole of my life, by two people who, themselves, have never healed from the pain of the abuses they were told was actually discipline. I am sorry but, ALL HAWAIIANS need to ACCEPT – it was abuse, and you are each and all still reeling from it all.
Rather than listen to what is not being said, by anyone at all, some of you say it is not going to work, and the others do not trust what is said and what is the antidote for the things that ail us all in the soul.
And all this does is perpetuate within me, these things called self-doubt, self-loathing, an energy of not being able to trust me and what I know as being my truth.
Maestro would never lie to me about the things that he sees in me that I need to work on, and neither does Amber, or Gator, or Mama No…as well as my good friend Bobby. It is not apparent to me that I need to remember not only who I am, every time it is that someone purposely harms me emotionally, but also what I am – which is an Empath.
Because I am an Empath
Because I am an Empath, I feel things lots deeper than most, and more, I feel things that others feel, even when those others are not realizing that they are reacting to the energies that they feel within them. Because I am an Empath, and more, a water sign (most empathetic of all the water signs is the Pisces….ugh…Dannie, Greg….Jeremy…OMFG…I am right, right? I am not the only one feeling the bullshit of the entirety of mankind, right? Even though that entirety might only be the circle of souls I am the closest with….ugh…like birds of a feather…fish in the same school – this would be us..ALL of us ) I tend to confuse whose energies I am feeling most, and more, whose energies are false ones and being used by others to cover up their own pain.
In these energies are where the things which live within me (which I am no longer going to allow it, even though it is there…I can turn it into something else…I will figure it out because I always do) come out, and in these energies is where it is contained, every little hurt that I have ever had to feel and every little bit of bullshit that others have handed to me that apparently they could not handle – so they give it to others in the form of bullying and in the form of having doubts about themselves, which automatically makes a bully assume that we have these same doubts. Of course we do, but we are not going to hand them off to someone else to deal with.
They are ours to work with, but, at the same time, it is not anyone else’s right or business or duty to point out what they perceive as being someone else having flaws. The one thing that tires an Empath out the most is carrying the weight of people who do not bother to acknowledge who they are for real. People would feel so much better and lighter if they would just try harder to carry their own weight rather than placing it onto others in the form of belittlement, the form of berating, the form of bullying, the form of dismissing and not truly understanding the depths of the emotional soul.
When it comes to things that harm other people, and those people bring it to your attention, it is not a choice that you get to make in terms of who it is that you are trying to prove anything to. It does not matter what you know better or more of, and really, the things that you are fighting with others over are the things that re important to you. What makes you believe that the things that are important to others are not important, period? What makes you think that what it is that you have to say to anyone at all is somehow open to your own inability to see past what you prefer rather than what is needed by anyone else?
There is a horrid, collective mana, an energy that too many people have right now and an energy that makes anyone at all believe that somehow, things that bother them and that other people have to say are the things that others will not be affected by if you are not careful with how you present things to anyone at all. That something bothers you is one thing, but that you will continue to make light of things that bother someone else and make those things not be as important to you as they are to someone else, it only tells a person that you are just as …arrogant…as anyone else is, because in not accommodating anyone, and making those people pretty much beg for you to just simply not fuck with them in the manner that you have stated you will continue to, you are not being a healer – in fact, you are being the asshole that I am believing that you have always been, just older and more able to prettily call someone else stupid.
The only stupidity is not seeing the value in a person who is there and asking you nicely to knock your shit off.
Your refusal to do so makes you not only a bully, but a fucking phony.
Yeah bitches..I fucking said it, so, perhaps about this time is when you ought to realize you are not fucking perfect or better than anyone, and mother fucking deal with it