Soul Contract

Hawaiian 100 dollar bill yo

Human beings absolutely NEED an exchange of energies with other human beings.  There is something called an exchange of energies between souls. That there is this exchange is one thing, but that within that exchange is a contract created is completely a different story.

Ho’okupu, in the Hawai’ian language means to honor someone else with an even exchange of Mana, or spiritual energy, for the work that they have done, for the thing that they have brought to someone else that is a thing or a service that the other person needed. It is essentially the word that I want to call “barter,” but it isn’t bartering – it is exchanging goods or services for pay or honors.

It is not until we have chosen, instead, to not honor the agreement that was made between souls, let alone human beings on the tangible level, that the ugliness begins. The ugliness begins when the contract between souls has been violated. The way that it is violated is simply when one soul’s body decides that it has a better idea and that better idea involves that person NOT honoring the contract between souls.

The Contract Between Souls

There are a lot of ways in which I could write this so that it would be much easier for people to not get offended when I say that there are way too many people who we share the air with who are SO cheap, or at least it seems like it, that they will scrutinize every tiny little thing that you bring to their attention in terms of what is, and more, what is not, correct about the reason why it is that they seem to believe that you are at their service when in reality what you are is IN service to all of humanity.

This is not about just money, folks. This more about respect for other people and what they do that makes them thrive. Think about it this way – would you want to walk away from something that you so enjoy doing and also get paid for just because people seem to refuse to want to pay you? And really, I don’t know if it is a refusal to pay, or more of a control thing, but I do know that humans, for the most part, like feeling like they have some sort of measure of control over other people, like making it seem as though we have the one-up on others.

When we choose to not exchange the proper energies, we don’t have anything more than a Karma debt.

Ladies and gentlemen…once again to the stage – KARMIC DEBTS

You see, folks, Karma, as most of you know, is very real. It takes its form in a manner that whoever must make things right will understand even as they might not understand why it is that they are now having trouble trying to get what they have coming to them. The one thing that is most maddening is when the Karma debt that others must pay and the lesson brought to them through us also involves our not getting what we need from them. This is not to say that we will never get what we need, only to say that if we are indeed, and unknown to our thoughts, the teacher of the lesson for the person refusing to trade right energies, we will suffer alongside them, and we won’t know why.

This is when the most of us think it is that we are who are paying this debt, when in reality, we are part of the important line of teachers for someone else. I know this lesson very well. I have been the bringer of lessons for a whole lot of people, and when it comes to that point where they are not getting it in terms of why they are suffering, I am driven to ask them who they have been to that point and why it seems as though they are not paying attention to the theme of their pain.

The Theme of Your Pain

At this time, the pain in my life is connected to tangibles. It is because for the entirety of my life, I have always placed people before things. Then I married the one person who, until recently, I didn’t believe was a very greedy, insecure mess of a human being whose only security came in the form of how much money and toys he had.

My money and toys, for a long time, because that is how HE wanted it, were connected to his ability to gain those things for me, as though I would never be able to gain them for myself. The problem with this was that I was being abused, and because of that, I was totally dependent upon his choices so that I could survive. I won’t lie – it was a nice, materially rich survival, but in that method of survival, my soul was dying.

My soul was dying because it seemed as though I was not going to be what or who I was meant to become. While I know that it is not the case, I still had to go through all what I went through in order to be this me. In order to be this me, I had to exchange these energies with this person for a very long time so that in my own thinking, I would automatically have that thought that even as money is nice, people are nicer. Even as things make me happy, being with the people who I love the very most is the most important thing in the world to me. I needed to be reminded of this, and the only way that Spirit would be able, through Her own Wisdom and Her own measure of communicating particularly with me, was through the giving to me and the taking away from me OF me.

In order for me to be this particular me, and a version of me who I can now tolerate, I HAD TO learn a whole LOT of truths about a whole LOT of things and those lessons had to come through the person and the relationship that I thought, wrongly, that I would be able to depend on the most.

I am ecstatic to say that, even though I went through whatever it was that I went through, I learned who I am by learning who I am NOT. In order to know who this version of me is, I had to peel away the layers of wrong-me so that I could get to this me.

In order to be this me is the same as “in order to be this you”

That anyone else will break a soul contractual agreement is one thing, but that we do not know why it is that we have to suffer with other people is quite a different thing all together.

We do not know what another person’s purpose in our lives is right at the moment that we meet them. We do not know what it is that they are teaching us or what we have to learn from them. We only know that they are in our lives and that whatever purpose they hold for us remains to be seen.

I am not the only person on this planet who has had to go through things. My Maestro has been through a whole LOT of things, and my Mexican soul sister, a woman who I grew up with and whose name is Karla, also been through a whole lot of things, and just like me, these two people had to get through some very ugly crap in order to be who they are right now, and who they are right now is not someone who they thought they might be. While I cannot say who either of these people might have thought they might be is neither here nor there, but, the fact remains that they each have gone through so very much that to think that either of them would be here, alive and well and here to live their purpose is the most miraculous thing of all to me.

It is miraculous NOT because I do not believe that either of the two of them would be able to handle whatever came their way to this point, but because of the strength of their character being so strong that there would be no other way for either of them. This is the trade off they each made with Spirit, the deal that they each made that told not only The Mother Goddess who they knew they were meant to be, but that they were not willing and neither ready to throw in the towel and let the people who let them down in their own lives win again.

They didn’t win, in case you didn’t know

I could sit here and tell people what normally I will tell them, and that is that while it appears that other people in our lives who bring to our lives all of the turmoil have not won, it is a hard sell when I am telling people one thing and their lives are telling them what they, the people, have heard for the majority time of their lives – things change for the better if we are willing to see to it.

Yes…you have to be willing to see to your own lives, and you have to be willing to believe that you have value and are worthy to live that best life. You have to be able to grit your teeth, get through the last of the crap from the last crap you went through and all of the crap that came before it. You have to use your strength and your will and you have to cry, laugh, get good and fucking angry, and most of all, you have GOT TO try.

If you do not try to at least be the best version of you that you can create, that is when all those people who talked all that shit to you for all that time will win. If you do not at least keep up with the contract that you have with your own soul to live your life to the fullest in every part of it, everyone else will win. If you do not try hard to just not allow what other people think of you just not matter anymore (and we ALL have this problem, myself especially included), they will win. If you bother with being bothered, most assuredly, they will win.

They will win because you will have allowed theirs to be the governing voice in your head instead of the voice that tells you that you are worthy to Love you. They will win because you will lower your own self to accept what they think about you as your truth. They will win because you will, once again, have allowed them to bully you into thinking that you need to be what is their model of you rather than who you are for real.

They will win because even though you do not believe one word of what they are saying, have said, might say, you give a shit of what their opinion of you is overall, and overall, the only opinion that ought to matter to you, at least at first, is your own. This is not to say that you should not be bothered by what people think of you, because it is human to want to be Loved and accepted by people, period. But, when it comes to who you are, for real, and people do not like who you are, which is different than what you look like (you’d be amazed at h ow many adults don’t realize that they think what they look like is who they are…yeesh!) it makes you wonder what it is that you can do to make them Love you.

Nothing – you can DO nothing to make ANYONE Love you as you are

Unfortunately, human beings do not come with a guarantee that says that we are going to be Loved by everyone justbecause we are this version of who we are. The contract between souls will not allow for it. If we are Loved by everyone, we will not know what is darkness against the Light. We need to know what is our own darkness so that we can also know our own light, and in that knowing we have to also be able to see in others that which is also within us. That’s right – we have to know what is darkness, not to avoid it, but to be able to use  it.

Using our darkness to also highlight the light that is within us is one of our tools for learning. Without being able to recognize what is the part of us that can be intolerable, can be offensive, can be that person who just sort of climbs into their shell of the soul for protection from the ugliness that is or can be life, we do not know ourselves fully and therefore cannot accept who we are because we will not know who we are. Without being able to know what we are not, we cannot know what or who we are, and if we do not know that much, how the hell can we honor the contract of the Soul which we have made not only with others, particularly our Soul tribes, and more particularly, our very selves?

You see, other people are not the only ones who we have a soul contract with. We also have this same contractual agreement with ourselves. It isn’t only my Soul Tribe who I have contracts of the soul with, isn’t only the Maestro, isn’t only Karla, my kids, my blood relations…I also have to honor this contract with me.

Honoring the contract with you

We let ourselves down the most, and we do this when we are not willing to live up to who we are rather than what is stressing us out in the tangible world. This is not my telling you that the work that you do in the tangible sense does not have to get done or is somehow unworthy of the time and Love you spend on it. I totally get it.  We all know that is not the truth.

What I am saying is that any time we take on work, and any time we are in an exchange of energies with other people, our contract with ourselves is that we do our highest best, no matter what we are doing. When we do things at a lower energetic level in the soul, and we do things because we want other people to know what it feels like if we purposely and out of spite or revenge don’t do them, whose soul are we actually dishonoring? Theirs…or ours?

Our own, of course, and we are told this much when we leave a place and we know we left not having done our highest best good, or at least have given our highest best effort, and that little voice within tells us that we could have done better. This is not me saying to get taken advantage of, because you are, for the most part, smarter than that, and honoring the soul contract with one’s own self is not one that says that you have to do things to impress other people or to even make them like you, and certainly you do not, under any circumstance, do things honorable for dishonorable people .You know to do things that make your soul feel like it has done the best that it could with the body that it lives in, doing the tangible things that it does with the soul’s purpose in mind.

That is how things need to be – everything done with the Soul’s purpose in our minds, no matter what it is we are doing…even our tangible work in the world. 

I Love You All

ROX

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