“Integrity…it’s that one thing you cannot buy”
These are the words that a lot of people have said to me over the course of my life, and it turns out that yes, we indeed CAN do whatever it is that we care to, but we must remember that, above all, it is our integrity which, through our choosing and through our actions, will either become stronger or will come into question.
I have contemplated things over the last few months, and really, I know exactly the things and people who I care to have in my life, and each and every one of them also knows who they are. They are the ones who told me, who remain to tell me, that no matter what it is that I care to do in this particular lifetime, to do it with my own personal energy signature,my own special love for me, for the people with whom I am the closest. Even though it is that there are things that suck, badly, right now, we must all think in the manner that is “you can do whatever you want, so long as you are not disrespecting others, so long as you are not hanging around for people to take advantage of your good nature or for you to do the same thing to them, and more than that, as long as you can remain true to who you are.”
True to who I am, folks need to know, right now, that the moment you step out of that place called “The Real You” is when your trouble starts.
You know that you are in trouble when you begin to question your own motives and your own actions. There is nothing better as a means by which we can balance out our own bullshit with others than to ask ourselves if what we are doing, would we want someone else to do to us? This is not an easy question to answer when it pertains to ourselves, and neither is it an easy one to answer when it is that we are talking about someone to whom we have given much love. We humans tend to idealize one another, namely when it comes to the person or people who we love the very most. We are scared to death to not see them as what we want to see them as, and then when their sins are in our faces, we want to turn tail, and the reason that we want to turn tail is not what anyone thinks it is and is something that I am too happy to reveal.
When we idealize other people, we are not giving them the credit of being fully capable of fucking up, badly, and when we are hurt or our lives are harmed from that fuck up, we want other people to pay a heavy price, NOT for the things that are outside of us, but for the reality that is the pain within, and that is not cool at all. When the time comes, though, we tend to understand one thing, and that one thing is that our inner pain sucks okole. We love to point our fingers, love to make sure most people who are closest to us know that they have made us hurt, have made it so that they understand we are angry at them, but what we are not prepared for is facing our own crap.
That is the hardest part of all, facing one’s own bullshit.
Facing one’s own bullshit
If there is one thing that I hate doing, but that I have to do a whole lot lately, it is to point out the sins of others, mostly because I already know what mine are and I do not need to be reminded of them. I am well aware of it when I hurt someone, meaning that I do not need to pile more of my own hurt on someone else to carry for me. That is my job, just like it is your job and really, it is no one else’s business, when you think about it and after you have told anyone else at all about, to have to care about how you feel. That is your job. Am I talking to one person in particular? Nope. It is just that there are a LOT of people who I have spoken with this week past, and a lot of people who are without a lot of the normal niceties that one would expect for this time of the year and it really is because there are still a lot of humans on the planet who believe that in certain situations, they are without sin, or are without as much sin as someone else might. Let me remind you all of one thing, and I use the word “sin” for the simple fact that we all know what it means….that one thing is that…sin is sin, no matter what, and we are all capable of committing many, many sins, most of them not against others, but more, on behalf of our very sorry ass selves.
What is not apparent to most of these people is that the failure in their happiness is due to the idea that they, themselves cannot or simply will not bother to look at themselves in all of the crap that has happened these last couple of weeks. We humans are phenomenal at laying the guilt trip, that is, until someone like I come along and make it known that I am having a hard enough time with carrying my own crap, that what I have, to this point, have taught anyone at all is to simply be able to stand on their own without having to call in the gossiping cavalry or to defame or slander anyone else. Am I talking about me? Nope. I give, or at least try to give, NOT ONE PERSON any reason to have to lie about me or who I am. When I say something to anyone at all, I will do my best to keep my word, and if I cannot, I will tell whoever it is that I have given my word to the reason that I cannot.
It is called a little energy, a trait, if you will, and piece of a human soul that it cannot go through this lifetime without, and that one little thing that makes a big huge difference is called INTEGRITY.
Integrity…it’s that thing you are fucking off
Yes…I indeed do use some very adult type language, but it is because I tend to communicate these teachings to people who like to consider themselves “adult.” And while it may well be that you are, in years, technically and “adult,” there are things that you say and do, things you are not even really aware of you doing, that are nothing more than bad habits and seriously useless traits that, when you were younger, may have been useful, but as you got older, you hopefully have realized that it is all broken, it needs fixing, and no, you cannot jimmy-rig what has become so fucked up just so that it will work or appear to work, because really, it ain’t gonna work. No matter how hard you try to make it work. It just will not work. At all. So please stop forcing the proverbial square block into the round hole because the parts are not going to fit. Ever. And you just need to understand that much.
It is not that it would not ever work, but more that there are a lot of us who feel like they are really without sin. It is not until they realize that they have fallen short of the glory of the soul within them that things begin to make sense and how awful it is that it…you know, things…have to get to any point like this at all before we will get out of our own way, understanding that the other person is not the only guilty party – that we are all guilty in some manner, and that no one is without a blemish, because we show up into this motherfucker already damaged.Think about it.
Yeah…I am pissed – you bet your ass I am, and it is because too many of the humans on this planet fail to see that they cannot walk on water, that just because they have been hurt, that it is not forever, that on some level you are as wrong in all of the crap as anyone else would be, so why keep on keeping score when the score is really zero and no one wins? Why is it so important to anyone at all that we are right rather than right minded?
It’s because we have only been taught to be right, to make sure people know that we are technically right, and to make sure that those people know that they are beneath us. This is the truth. It’s ugly, isn’t it? It is hurtful, isn’t it? It kind of makes you want to not be such an ass hat when things do not go your way, simply because your ego cannot handle it anymore. That’s right – I said it, so fucking deal with it. The reason you are so not happy is because your ego keeps telling you that you are owed anything at all, and if we each bothered to see to ourselves and see for ourselves the things that we are not showing up in our own lives about, we would also see there the truth that is our own love for our very selves. If we cannot love our own self, who then can we love for real?
If you cannot get through this lifetime without someone else right there for you to be horrid to, I promise that you will not die and you might even fucking learn something. The one thing that I have leraned is that I can teach whatever I want to teach, be the best at what I do and with the part of society that I do my job with, but unless those who I am teaching really apply it all and take it to heart, and unless they are more willing to learn rather than try hard to skate through things and believing that they are somehow better than anyone else, you have a very big and ugly rude awakening that is coming to get you sooner than later, and no, there is nothing that I or anyone else can or even should do for you, because unlike a cheat sheet for a scan-tron test paper, in life there is no cheat sheet.
In life, when you fuck things up, you have to make them right. In life, when you do wrong and you do not even bother with a fucking apology, you are GOING TO go through whatever it is that you are intending and wishing onto anyone else at all. This is not my rule, but the Law of the Universe. You cannot escape your own ignorance and you can never escape the karma that you create that you will expect will just go the fuck away if you are also not willing to make right the wrongs and the hurts, to your best abilities, with others. You can be all the hard ass you want to be, but in kind those are who you will end up with. You can be all the “poor me” you want to be, but that is who you will end up with. You can be, say, do whatever the fuck you want, but remember that you will either create a karma debt, and for sure a lot of hurt feelings, but most of all, you will HAVE TO go through whatever it is that you have wished onto others, no matter what. Anger and being hurt ain’t good enough excuses to have to deal with whatever bullshit you volunteered to go through with anyone at all.
Remaining ignorant to your own crap is not a good thing – being strong enough to rise above your own ignorant bullshit is the key. Choosing to pretend to be too ignorant to get it is crap.
It is what is meant by people telling you, often, that ignorance indeed is bliss…
Integrity…it’s that thing that you obviously know not one fucking thing about
I Love You All…even when I have to cuss you out
Click the picture to tell Scott to put a shirt on !! Haha…just kidding, brotha…Thursdays at Friar Tuck’s in Pomona, CA..these guys – my friends, The Pharmaceuticals !