This past week brought us all something that we have waited for, called the Truth. While we may not like what has transpired, make no mistake – what we are experiencing is meant to be.
Things are not fun right now and this is true for a whole lot of us. Many of us are being shown truths we have never wanted to look at head on, while others are being given the truth of things, and the truth of things are as ass backward from what we thought was there in the first place. And no matter how any one of us feels about the things happening around us, in the lives of those who we care the most about, and most of all, within our very selves, it is not rocket science to think that even though much of this energy we are currently experiencing sucks okole, I have been hard-pressed to find anyone who does not agree that it sucks, but is needed.
There are severeal reasons why all of this ‘ugh’ is needed
A lot of us here on planet Earth have been so busy avoiding what it is that we do not want to grow toward, but like all else in nature, grow, we must. Growth hurts. Growth makes us cry, and makes us rage, and makes us go through things that we thought we were done with. While it is that certain people represent the things that hurt us, that give us pain, or conversely, give us a feeling of wholeness and renewed energy, all of us still have some stuff that we need to let go of, and whether we like it or not, we are, without restraint, letting go.
Letting go of things about who we are, or that we thought we were or maybe even still think we are, is painful. It is painful because on some level, we have to accept that things are, in some cases and in lots of ways, pau hana, meaning that we are done working on it, that maybe the others involved are not willing to change, not for us but for themselves, and we have to just accept it. It is hard to accept certain things, hard to deal with the way that some things have happened, and it hurts us to the very core middle of us. We have gone on like this for such a long time that the things that we have accepted, and the things that we have dealt with and lived with and just allowed to be as they are have called upon us to change – no, not the others, but ourselves.
We want so badly for other people, namely those who we love the most, not to hurt, not to hurt themselves, not to rob themselves of the goodness that is them, the goodness that is life that takes a bit of doing to deal with anyway, and when we find out that all this time we maybe were not wrong, but that we did more than we should have, gave more than we had, and did it all from Love, and no matter who they are, they did not step up. This does not include the things that we did not understand, or perhaps were not well enough informed about, but the things that we know so, so very much about, which are things that we have each not wanted to face, and are the things that have caused us to feel helpless for a very long time now.
Some of these things include other people, but at the bottom of it all it is simply our very selves we are facing. We are learning to accept that the things that we had hoped for with some folks just cannot happen for them, and we are very disappointed that it is like this. We cannot control what is the lessons and more, the way that other people learn. It might be that our method of learning is not what they can understand, and so we teach them from our point of view, showing them our perspective, and in that energy is the Love which is so needed by anyone, that when someone else, no matter who they are, fail to be all they can be, it hurts us, deeply.
I have gone through this all week, beginning last week, with people who I placed my hope for healing in, and all I can say about my own reaction to it all is that the learning that came this week to me would not have happened had I not gone through what I thought was the very end of my world. It wasn’t. The lesson that I specifically had to learn, I learned, and it was all about acceptance of things, about accepting that some people are not ready for the growth that, again, no matter what, will come to them. Lots of us see the growth and the pain from the growth as what it really is – temporary. Yet, for too many of us, that temporary ouch in and of itself (you know, it being temporary and all) seems, from their perspective, a little too inconvenient for their liking and their schedule and their social life. They seem to like things as they are, but the truth is that in reality, it is not that they like it or are comfortable with it, but that they really have no idea that they are learning something.
Some of us absorb the things that we learn in a sponge-like manner, and we take on these vile energies for the purpose of learning what is there, and more, what is not. What I thought would be the very end of things on one end turned out to be the opportunity to make things for someone else a little bit easier where I specifically am concerned. Where it was that I believed it to be the beginning of the end was actually the growth which I so badly needed, so dearly begged The Mother Goddess to grant me with, and here I am, a few days later, newly minted with thoughts that are not what they were just a few days ago.
Where it was that I believed the sins I had committed these last few weeks, sins which were misunderstandings more than they were anything intended as hurtful, it was actually my being taught the reality that is balance, that is the give and the take, that is the granting and the receiving. Had I not bothered to think in this manner, I might still be the torrid wreck that I was at the start of the week. Daily, the inner light within me glows a bit brighter, because with the release of the things that I thought were the truth, it turns out that there was a perfecting of my strength and a clearing out and a cleansing of what no longer is needed for me to grow, and most of all, the brilliance that I thought was no longer there became the things by which I knew that, for the first time in a very long time, perhaps even in my life, I found that while there is a lot of stuff that I have to get over and let go of, that this includes things and thought and ways of being which really do not apply to me and neither to the people with whom I share the most time with, care about the very most, and have nothing but the deepest, truest energy of Aloha for.
This, I find, is my very truth.
The Truth Relived Through the Pain
We have always known the truth. Our Ethereal senses tell us what is the truth before our bodies kick in and confirm that truth for us.
Lots of us have had aches and pains and loads and loads of crap that we have been feeling as being the heaviest, loneliest, most awful energies we have ever had to carry within us, but right now, even as some of the things that we still can see physically are still there, we can and have been looking at them with a renewed sight. It is almost like we are seeing things for the first time. In my own sight are the seeds planted by me over the course of many, many years, and being the gardener that I am, I have tended what is there for the bulk of my time on this planet, and realize now that no matter what it is that I am looking at, that I am who planted all those seeds and now those seeds, over the course of many long years, have come to fruition.
Like any garden planted, always there is the threat of pests, and the threat of others trampling our flowers, taking our harvest, and we do not realize that what we have planted is showing us where it is that we need to deal with some things that maybe we may have overlooked. We wanted to let the weeds grow, because at first, the weeds mirrored what is another edible plant. We tended the weeds, not realizing that they were weeds, and when the flowers finally came into existence, we could not look at those weeds as anything other than what they are – not purposeful.
Yet, at the same time, when we think about those weeds, and the hopes that we had that they might not be what we knew they were the whole time, we loved that plant, not only in hopes that it would bear fruit, but more, just because it was ours, and just because it was part of our garden. We loved it as much as we did the rest of the crops, sometimes to the point of thinking that maybe we could replant it somewhere else. Yet, all along, we knew within us that it was just a weed.
This same thing can be applied to some of our behaviors this week, some of our expectations and some of the outcomes. It is not the people who are the weeds, but the things that they do and enact in our lives that are the things that we need to consider being what is really bothering us. It is not them, personally, but the things that they bring to our lives that, rather than seeing them as our only way out, are actually things that we need to learn to deal with, and a lot of the time, we would rather not. Of course we would rather not, because normally, the things that we are being taught are brought to us and into our awareness by those who we love and care about the very, very most. Sure, some of it is related to us and what it is that we need to learn, but the most of it is rooted in the things that we would rather not look at and not so much recognize, but have always known as the truth.
At this moment, like right now, I am going through this. I am going through this feeling that, once again, I am being made to feel like I am doing something SO egregiously wrong, so, so, so vile, and so something that will cut into the comfort of other people, that when I think about it, it makes me want to continue forward. Even as I am in tears almost, over the things that I have had to listen to about how what I have to do and what I am going to do affects their social calendar, I care not one bit about it, because this is not something that I have not already been through, this week even, and it is fine with me.
As per usual, I am who will have to step up, throat exposed, while the rest of the world does what it has to, as well…but…you betcha…I ain’t scared of it.
In fact, because of it, it has given me something that no one but me, and such things as temporary strife, can…
…the reality that is empowerment…
I Love You All
The Loveliest Photography capturing the Loveliest Hula Wahine can be found by visiting www.randyjaybraun.com
Hawai’ian Mana Card Readings can be done for you by me, and all you have to do is send an email to ReverendRoxie22@gmail.com, with “MANA CARD READING” in the subject line, and I will reply with all the details!