No matter what anyone at all thinks, the masks that we each wear and show people as our truth of who we each are are the very masks which also exclude us from a most important truth about us – our own.
I say it often, that I wear many hats, but I have found that it is a much more comfortable fit without the mask of strength that I had very locked into place. It was merely a mask and one which I no longer wear because the very truth of me is that I am the model of strength. I have to be. I have been through way too much to not be. It is the gift of the Goddess, given to those who have endured, sometimes by choice, and a whole lot of times by our having no choice other than to just basically grin and bear whatever it is that life uses us to teach us with. In my case, I was taught the reality of what is, and what is not Love, in every form, through a lifetime of emotional abuse which led to almost the entirety of my adulthood in a domestically violent situation. The mask I wore throughout this whole time is one that was not a good fit.
Masks are not meant to be permanent fixtures on our heads
We go through our lives believing whatever it is that we are told that we should believe. We see it in every area of life, the idea that the masks we wear are the same as the proverbial hats we are donning at any given time in our lives. What we are not realizing is that hats are different than masks. I wear the hat of “Professional Weirdo,” sometimes, and all of the time, I am wearing the hat bearing the name “Kahuna Wahine,” but never am I required to wear a mask to do any of the things that I do, all of the time.
If you were to look in a mirror while wearing a hat, you would see there in the reflection a likeness of yourself which is the truth of you wearing a hat. However, if you were to don a mask, even while wearing said same hat, the image staring back at you would not be the truth of who you are, because the truth of who you are is remiss to even believe a mask is needed. You see, the truth of who you are is not what you are trying to get the rest of the world to believe is the real you. A person can work out, become the most cut-like-diamonds person that they know and anyone who they know, knows, and behind that person on the outside we might find someone there who is actually scared of not being what it is that they present to the world as themselves.
There is not even a tiny measure of what is true when we are talking about what is on the outside versus what we keep hidden behind the masks that we are choosing to wear. Referring to the cut-like-diamonds thing again, I will say, right now, that it doesn’t matter what it is that the rest of the world is looking at, because what they are seeing is not the real picture of who a person is if they are only looking at what is on the outside. What is on the outside comes from what is on the inside. If what is on the inside is something that we are not very proud of, is something that scares us or is something that we have created and did not realize that what we created is totally NOT the truth of us, hell yes we are going to not want to reveal what lurks beneath the mask which hides our truth if what we have been portraying and silently telling the world is the way we are and more, actually WHO we are.
We cannot hide who we are all the time. Truth tends to seep out when we least expect it to. If we are someone who is scared all the time, and we wear the mask of the tough guy, eventually the tough guy mask, provided that the catalyst to whatever the mask is hiding somehow is forced off by a shedding of tears or a raging of anger that tends to run off at the mouth, falls off. It has to fall off, because it is comprised of something that we cannot continue to think we can repair with the generic bondo known as what is not our truth. When the truth is what we need to know, and we choose to continue to hide behind what we think makes us seem to be the cat’s okole, but in reality, we know is NOT the truth, the mask, eventually, falls to pieces.
The mask is eventually found to be just what it is meant to be – a facade which hides the truth. What no one who chooses to hide behind their mask wants to believe is that no matter what, their truth will be known, no matter what it is, and no matter how it is perceived – the truth only stays hidden as long as we are willing to suffer what is the mask and all of its sweaty stuffiness which always causes us to gasp for the air, to try hard to breathe and to be, all while hiding behind something that we think keeps us safe from our very own truth.
Behind your mask is not where the safety of the truth is at
You can wear your mask until you feel comfortable taking it off, but in the time that will pass between the wearing of it and the shedding of it, while you might recognize that which is the truth of others, you will not know what is your own truth, and you will become short of the credibility that you, yourself, are trying so hard to have and to maintain, but it is difficult to do that when the hands that you are meant to use for the right things are holding up this mask that is covering up the things that you do not want anyone to see, namely you.
You might think that you are safe there, but it is almost like being in a nightclub where the bouncers really are only there to protect the owners of the club and not the patrons. This is the same energy that you will end up having if you are not willing to drop the act that you would not like if someone else were running this same game on you. You would not like knowing the truth of anyone else if what you believed all along was what you thought you could. No one likes being lied to, and no one likes being told something about anything at all if it means that they are going to end up looking foolish after the fact and after they have run their mouths about how great it is that you (insert way cool thing here) and then end up finding out that you had your mask on all along and that the cool person who you kept on telling everyone you are is nothing more than what everyone else is, too.
The thing which puts it all into perspective for us is when we have to deal with something particularly painful in that, when the painful thing started, that mask went on and never came off. It was like the one thing you thought you needed that you totally did not need. What you needed, you will find out if you have not already, was the ability to accept the truth, period, of anything, and about anyone, namely when it pertains to you. If someone else has a truth that pertains to you and it is not something that makes you look like that mask, people are going to start wondering about you, and then one day, they will not wonder anymore because they will know about the truth that you refuse to show the world. And really, the most beautiful thing in the world at all is the moment that we choose that the mask we have worn for so long is no longer something that is needed.
We get tired of the weight of the mask, and we get tired of the responsibility that we think we have to keep up appearances so that the rest of the world will accept this false version of ourselves. We never needed the masks. What we needed was the ability to face the truth, and in all of the madness that we humans seem to think is the right way and the right thing to do, we forgot that we were actually wearing a mask. We thought our mask was the truth of who we were or are, and that is the furthest thing from anything resembling the truth.
The truth is that a vulnerable you is a better version of the you who lives behind the mask. The vulnerable you is the real you, is the you who cannot take on anymore pain, and surely enough cannot deal with the weight of carrying the charade on forever. Some folks are awesome at the game of Charades, but that is just a game and in our lives we have to be able to glean the truth from others simply and only because we want the truth for ourselevs, as well. If we cannot see the truth, and cannot understand why certain truths exist, we cannot believe for a moment that somehow the mask that we choose will be the thing that will make us see what is the truth as it pertains to us.
When we bother with who we really are, rather than thinking that what everyone sees on the outside as being the only truth, we will know at that point the importance of being who we are, not for the benefit of the world, but for our own benefit. A person can run in circles trying to get people to take what is their mask as also being their truth. That same person can also and one day want to see the actual light that emanates from within them and that person will willingly take away the part of them that they think is the truth. This is a person who is also well on their way to their own Spirit’s healing, because of everything that we are each and all made up of, the truth is the one thing that we cannot deny and yes, it is also the very thing which in reality, we are made of.
We are all self-made in that, whatever it is that we think is our truth, this is the mask, or the reality, of who we really are. Who we really are is priceless and meant for a specific and grand purpose that only the Goddess knows about – we don’t even get to know what we are supposed to do until we are met with something or someone or both which will cause us to take cautious measure and don a mask. Some of us have to wear that mask for decades until one day, the mask cuts us off from the life-giving truth that is the air that the Soul breathes.
So pretty much…take the damned mask off already, and treat yourself to the fresh air called the truth.
No matter which way you look at it, the mask can either be taken off, or, one day, it will just fall off…and what will you do then, when your truth – the real truth that you have hidden behind that mask all this time…falls apart?
Think about it….
I Love You All !!
“Medicine Dance,” and “Chick Wisdom” – both coming soon to lulu.com !
In the meantime, check out my soul brother, Randy Jay Braun’s camera artistry….click here and then on “shop” to visit the “Women of Hula” page!