I must voice my thoughts about things in the world of women where men are concerned. Seriously, folks – enough is truly and dearly just absolutely ENOUGH!
I am going to try my very hardest to not sound like a petulant teen right now, but since it is that I have had to endure this sort of nonsense since I WAS a teen, I will let it be known NOW to the people who are reading this that I was mad yesterday, and that today I am just a little more than concerned about the way we women, as a whole, think about each other.
Come on, ladies, get over it already, would you? I mean, seriously, if it were the truth of me, that I would try to get a little bit of that man of yours, and do with him what I care to, I am promising you NOW that I am enough of a woman to make it so that if you are that worried about it, you, seriously, would no longer be in the mindset that a lot of you are, right this moment.
I am not here, and neither is my presence in the life of the men you all so dearly love, to be a threat. If anything, the things that you are saying and doing all on your own is what is the threat. If I seem like a threat, that is not me making me seem that way – that is YOU. I am not writing this today to get under your skin, at all. I am writing this today as a little measure of relief for those of you who have the very nerve to accuse me and that lovely person who you are so taken with of having relations other than the warm fuzzy energy created by the Love of the Soul of another human being.
That is, for real, no lie, no bullshit, what I, personally, specifically and ONLY have going on with any man who has had the balls to NOT look at me like I am but a piece of meat. This is what you, ladies, reduce me and others like me to when you think that any man you love, are interested in, whatever, is target for my affections. Let me get this one truth straight with you – I am NOT A BOOGER, and I CANNOT BE PICKED by ANY MAN. I chose your man as my friend because we are of the same Tribe of Souls who are here and in place in this lifetime to be who we are in each others’ lives for the specific mission that your men and I have to bring into tangible form in this lifetime. Period.
I Promise you all, right this moment, that I would not do to you anything that would cause you more hurt. And your hurt is very obvious and I am very aware of it. As a healer, I haven’t got the energy to put forth toward hurting someone – namely a Sister in this human lifetime – and over what? A man? Lemme tell you something, sistahs – the ONLY plans that I am making with any of your men are plans where, if you are in his life still, you will be a part of, but you HAVE GOT TO GET AHOLD OF YOURSELVES because really, and this is not me taking a shot at ya, but me telling you ALL that you are SO MUCH MORE THAN ONLY HIS OTHER HALF and for the life of me, I cannot figure out why you think I am the enemy?
I have nothing more with your men than a wonderful friendship, a kinship of the Soul that not even YOUR antics will cause a rift in. Why? Because, we are friends, that’s why, and unbeknownst to anyone who does not have a clue about who I am, you need to know, and believe, with an immediacy, that the problem with me that you have with me and any other woman in the midst of your men, it is not – NOT a ME THING, but it is dearly and truly a YOU thing, and it is something that I have waited, dearly even, for you to come and ask me about. I have waited, for ALL of you to ask me, not how you can make him love you more or how you can make him want to stay with you forever and ever amen, but how you and I can work on your issues, not only with him, but also, with your past. Yet you refuse.
I wish I knew WHY you refuse. I wish I knew what the hell it is about me that you seem to project your own insecurities onto, because really, I don’t think that way about you, and in fact, I tend to give people a little more credit than I have been given. One thing that a lot of you who have lambasted me, either personally and through and email or text or phone call, or, dammit, through those precious friends of mine who are your men, about, is the idea that he does not love you like he loves me. There is a reason. His love for me is not the sort that you think or believe it is. It is a familial kind of love, the kind that is not finite and the kind that outlasts the infatuation created by mere physical presence. There is never NOT going to be a time when we will NOT be friends. It is not your right, nor your place to choose for the men who you each love who they can and cannot be friends with.
More than that, if you think that I intimidate YOU, imagine what it might be like to be one of those men who you each have accused me of taking my time with, naked even, and who you think I am planning anything unsavory with. Really, girls, you should tell me what is bothering you more than the idea that here I am, being me and only being me, in their lives, and I had hoped your lives, too, and there you are, staring me down as though somehow, you are scaring me. Let me remind you that I fear spiders more than I fear any human being, because a spider cannot reason, but you sure can. I want so badly to show you who you truly are, not only so that I don’t have to go through this with you anymore, but so that maybe, we can actually be friends, and maybe, I can actually help you help HIM.
But you are all so worried that in that helping them that I have designs on them.
I really don’t. Right now my attentions are elsewhere, and the ones who know where it is – your men all know where it is. That is the nature of real friends with men and women – some of us actually know what a blessing it is to have these men in our lives to help us out some when it comes to things like, well, duh, ladies – MEN !!! I do not see your men like you do. They are my Soul brothers and every single last one of them (there are 8 of them) know this about me, about how I feel about them, and most of all, how very dearly I value their Love as much as I value them. They are the diamonds which I helped cut from the coal they once were, and it was, in part, because of you.
Yes- YOU ! For some of you, YOU are why we – me and your men – know each other, and not for any other reason than that they saw what their own issues were, and they knew that one way or another, they wanted to be the real person they are with you, so that you would either and in some cases for you each, no longer be hopeful for things that you helped mess up, badly. I know that I am still willing to work with you, all of the each of you, but that I will not come and look for you – that is bad weirdo practice and will not do it. For the ladies who are trying so hard to keep their men with them, and who think that I want anything more from them than what I already have, which is their love, respect and their FRIENDSHIP (ONLY! YEESH!) I want you each to know that you are better than this.
You are better than waiting for a man who you have outgrown (betcha didn’t see that one, did ya?), and yes, the reason you can’t see your own growth is because you are too busy seeing where he has not grown! What is up with that? I thought you wanted to be supportive, and accepting and to be the women you wanted to be. I can help you get there, but you have GOT TO STOP thinking about me like you are. NOW. Regardless of what you see me as being, you need very dearly to look at you for once, and really see what is there and hurting you so much, and realize that it is not me. I keep contact with your men because they are some of my most favorite people on the planet, have helped me to discover who I am, and WHO I AM NOT, have made it known to me that as much as I love and respect each of them, they also love and respect me.
And speaking of respect – you will notice that more than one of you have not yet met me, and that is because I have respect for the things that you each, coupled with these men you so love, have to deal with. I told them each that I am going to back off for a bit, so that you each and all can get to sorting things out. The problem is that you each are all still stuck in two years ago, in the sins of the past, and not even looking to see there that you are still doing what you did back then! How can you or anyone else heal from the pain if you keep going back to it, ripping the scab off of your wounds and expecting these guys to make things better for you? YOU HAVE TO MAKE THINGS BETTER FOR YOU !
I am challenging the each of you, as of this moment, to take me up on my offer, not so that I can go tell the rest of the world your weaknesses, but so that I can help you see that you are way better than all of this pain and all of this nonsense and seriously, so that you can open your eyes to the gem who you really are. I want to be friends, ladies, really. I want to help you to open up those places in your memory, not so you can hurt more, so that you don’t have to hurt anymore from those things, so that you can replace them all with good instead of the outdated pain that you all feel. I want to show you who you are, and the only way I can do that is if you respond to this writing, and by respond, I do not mean that you are welcome to try hard as you may care to rip me a new okole – that won’t happen, I am way stronger than you give me credit for.
I have not but the most dear respect for you each, but my patience with you all is wearing very thin. I am able to choose my own men, and able to know who they are in my life long before anything…naked…will happen. This I promise you. I wanna show you each how to be this discerning, if for anything at all, so that never again will you have to hurt, by your own choice even, like this again.
So, come on, girls…who will be the first of you to finally and with much Love in you for you, take me up on this? You know who you are. You know this is not something that I have taken from you. It has been there and is still there.
I want to know – are you not better than all of this?
I think you are…so let’s find out if I am right !
I LOVE YOU ALL !!