Often times are we given to bouts of anger, of impatience, and of things that knock our brains around for a bit. Yet, all the emotions that we feel can eat us up from the inside, out, and the only way to stop this from happening is for us to forgive the sins of those who transgress against us. It is normal to be angry from time to time, but when we allow that anger to become hatred there is nothing good that can come of it.
The only way toward our own return to our balance is to release the emotions knowing that eventually, if we are wise, we will see that the thing that caused us to have those emotions was a temporary thing. Sometimes, though, and there are a few of us who live this way, when we cannot let go of the pain and the angst caused by the anger, we allow it to become hatred.
The simple energy that is Forgiveness is harder to have than it is not, but my thought is that it is easier to get over a ding to the Ego than it is to overcome tragic physical illness brought about by the harboring of negative energy.
Not only that, when we feel like we need to forgive someone anything, it is also at that time that, too, we have to forgive ourselves….
Forgiving people is hard. I know this for sure. For a long time I had the hardest time with just letting go of my own anger with certain people. For a long time I wanted to hang on to being mad at them because I thought being mad at them taught them a lesson that only I could teach them. This did no one any kind of good at all. It would never do any kind of good at all anyway because the truth is that we can only change ourselves and no one else, and to be angry with anyone means that somehow they made us that way and too often we are inclined to stay in that mess of emotions that eventually become the hatred within us.
We want to believe that we are the victim, but volunteering things that way only serves us up with more victimization, and the harshest reality of that is we are who makes us the victim and no one else. When we are not willing to accept that it is up to us to do anything and we give our power away to other people through means of our allowing it to be the truth in our own heads that we hurt because someone else makes it that way and not because we are choosing to hang on to whatever it is that we are hanging onto, we also do not, if we are not so evolved, accept and neither realize that all along, it has been us.
All along, it has been us
All of the time that we have chosen to take and to waste on our believing and acting on energies that tell us that we are not to blame for how we feel is the same amount of time that it takes for any one of us to realize that it was not other people who needed us to let things go. It was us. Other people might be the catalyst to the things that we experience feeling, but it is not other people who make it so that we hang on to whatever it is that we feel.
We choose to not forgive, and we choose to hang on to the thing that makes us turn into a drama queen, and we are who chooses, or does not choose, to allow the thing that someone else did to go on as an unforgivable sin against all mankind. My first question to you, at least in regards to this part of forgiving people that is totally NOT forgiving people is “how come you are so cool that you think everything is owed to you, even someone else’s forgiveness?” Why is it that you feel like you need rectification for something that you are hanging on to? This means that you are not ready to forgive anyone, that you are more inclined to try to bring a person to their proverbial knees instead of allowing them to forgive themselves for the thing that they did or still do to you. What is up with that?
What is up with the idea that you are so special that you have to make it real to you by cutting someone else down and making them live in your stinkiness that is unforgiveness for whatever unholy transgressions you think were done purposely against you? And even if it was done purposely, why are you bothering to care what someone who will over and over again choose to hurt you because you are too blind to see what it is that they are teaching you? Why are you looking at the hurt and why do you keep looking at the hurt, and why do you expect more from a person who might not even have a clue of the soul sickness that they keep helping you stay sick from?
What is the deal with making people feel responsible for your pain, and what is it that makes you think that you have some sort of golden power over them when in reality it is they who are powerful, more than you are, in your life, and it all boils down to the forgiveness.
All boils down to the forgiveness
If anyone read my last blog – the one where I get good and down and dirty nasty with people – you see one side of me that takes a lot for me to reveal. There are only a few people on this planet who know who it is who I am addressing, and there are only one or two who know that when I hurt, I get MAD MAD MAD, and when I am that mad, I write about it, and when I write about it, I am forced to go through the emotions of the thing that brought to me the headache that can sometimes be other people. Other people make me mad in that they ask for help, and then they expect it to be like an aspirin, as if what I am able to do is somehow theirs to be able to conduct. When I tell them that no, I am not one of those healers who will do some sort of strange magic (because we all know that there is no strange kind of magic, only energetically charged kind that is either positive or negative) to make anyone who will ask that I “do something” in order for their hurting to vanish.
Healing, Spiritual Power, and yes, even Magick…all of these things are mechanisms of the Soul, and all of them cannot be utilized effectively WITHOUT the purity of intent being that which is above all, rightly intended. But that is neither here nor there, and the reason I brought it up is because it will illustrate for a lot of people that there is no magic spell, no ritual, no anything that will make YOU feel better about how YOU feel about someone else hurting you, even if they did not intend to hurt you. You are taking too much time and effort to not feel bad by making someone else feel bad -mainly the person who you think took the time to do to you what they did not mean to, and more so when we are talking about when they do NOT know.
The last thing you want to do is NOT take the time to feel your real feelings
Not feeling one’s own true feelings is the very stuff that the nightmare of addiction is made up of. No one realizes that the reality of addiction, while in part is due to what one is made up of astrologically, the other reality is that the reason that anyone will give themselves to any kind of addiction is simple – they are numbing their pain. Anger is pain. Sadness, pain. Self-loathing, pain, too. All of these things left unchecked lead to addiction. And addiction is housed in all kinds of things, and not all of those things are to be ingested. Sometimes it comes out as a sex addiction, and most of the time, substance addiction, but all of the time it is to cover up some sort of pain that we just do not want to address and see as the thing that is eating us alive.
The way that anyone feels about anything will lead them to either be stronger because they were willing to face it, or weaker, because they can only face it through the idea that painting it with an addiction will at least make it easier, and on the top of things this is the truth but overall it is the lie that is housed in the pain.
The Lie that is Housed in the Pain
The lie is that we are able to handle things without help, and by this I mean that sometimes that help comes in the form of a thought, or perhaps the form of a person who has what we need, and all the time we are so willing to believe even the lies that we hear that we know are lies that are also the lies that cover up the truth, and the truth is that when we are willing to turn our pain into something that it is not meant to be (the truth of us) we want so badly to fit a situation to who we are that we cannot see past the idea that maybe the thing that is causing us so much pain is causing us so much pain because the reality is that it hurts for a good reason, and that reason is so that we can recognize what it is that we do no like. In recognizing what it is that we are not too fond of, sometimes we find out that we are who brought it to our lives and the worst part is that sometimes we are too ready to hang on to that pain because in that pain is the “before this all happened I was fine and good with my life.”
Yet, not all of us are inclined to do the things that it will take to NOT have to go through the pain so as to stay free of the things and the habits that cause us to hurt more, and when we hurt more, it shows.
In order to get over the lie housed in the pain, we have to be willing to not only see what it was that someone else brought to our lives but also how much we hurt or how unfortunately we chose to deal with the anger. Anger can become hatred, and hatred kills our souls which ultimately leads to the killing of ourselves and then our bodies. The lie that we tell ourselves is that we are not forgivable, that we are such bad people on our own that Spirit will never see to it that our lives will be magical, and the truth is that this is not the truth. It stems from the belief that in order to forgive others that they must perform great acts of kissing our okoles, and they must take our biting remarks and our energy that is angry on as the reality that we are in regards to them. Essentially we want them to bow to our sense of being hurt by them, and we want them to pay for it again and again, even though we, ourselves, would never think that this was okay were that it were us.
Can You Forgive ?
This is the ultimate question – can you forgive? Can you forgive yourselves for believing the things about you that you have always known were not the truth, and can you forgive the people who brought their opinion disguised as the lie that you housed in your pain? Can you totally give in to that pain so that from within it you can come forth and heal from it from having gone through it all? Can you give yourself the chance just once to become the imperfectly perfect absoluteness that is the example of all that is The Divine and realize that you are a part of it and that it is a part of you?
Can you bother with the idea that you are Loved beyond measure, beyond the idea that someone else finds in you a reason to hate themselves so much that they have to point out what they see in you that is also in themselves, and from that knowing, can you allow someone the freedom that is you forgiveness, not only of them but also of you?
Can you trust yourself to know what you are doing, enough so that once you have spoken your words to another person, words of forgiveness, can you also extend the same Love to yourself?
Can you do the one thing that you know is going to give you and the person who you are angry with the most Love energy that you can by simply stating one thing?
“I Forgive You”
I Love You All !