Monthly Archives: June 2013

Other peoples’ time is valuable

When it comes to things that other people offer, no matter what, it pays to value them and their time…

You could sit there thinking to yourself that what you do is very valuable, and it likely is. Yet, there is a huge portion of the population for whom it is nothing at all to take what they will from another person without compensating them for their time, even in a small way. People love to be appreciated. When we appreciate others and are grateful simply for the thought of our helping them get where they need to be we are exchanging Love on a higher level.

An exchange of higher energies

There is nothing quite more deflating OR defeating to another person’s Spirit than to undervalue who they are by undervaluing what they do. If anyone does anything at all for another person, a kind word is wonderful, but to be appreciated through that person telling another person of how great a job they think you do is pure bliss. It is wonderful to be recognized for the things that you do. When a person is valued not only as a person but also for the things that they do in relation to other people, regardless if it is in a business sense or otherwise, a person will always know that they are valued because they will want to continue to help others, even when they, themselves, are without a whole lot. I know this animal. I have known this animal my entire life, and most recently was introduced to the idea that sometimes, even though we might be Loved and cared about, even though who we are as a Spirit might be valued, there is nothing at all like being valued for the work that you do.

There is nothing like seeing the smile on a friend’s face when they come to you, saying thanks for hooking them up with their last gig. There is no feeling like the overwhelming sense of pride in one’s self when they know that they were able to help another person, especially if that other person could really use that help.

We don’t realize how important we are to others until it is time for an even trade of energies. This could be anything. An exchange of energies traded for time spent on someone else’s dream is the highest form of gratitude that there is, and it is because when we do things for other people, automatically we are doing for ourselves. When we give to others a piece of ourselves so that they can realize what it is that they have always wanted to, we immediately get the gratification of knowing that what we have done for someone else is valuable enough for others to take notice. When other people take notice of what we do for them and they tell another person that we have done anything at all, this is when the compensation of who we are versus what we do comes into play. Even as who we are sometimes melds with what we do, we are no more recompensed for our work than what we expect.

If we expect to be respected in the manner that we care to be, we have to expect that as the reality and without a sense or an inkling of doubt behind the thought. When we doubt something, it will always be that we will get what we need, but the thing is, it won’t be as grand as we want it or desire it to be. It will be what we think it is. When we decide that we are valuable beyond even what we want to believe, this is when the fun starts. This is when we start to see that who we are is more valuable than what we do, and at that time what we do becomes that much more noticeable. It becomes more apparent that who we are is shown in the work that we do.

It might be shown in the work that we do, but…

There are always going to be people who believe that somehow, they are owed by us. There are always going to be people who will grace the planet thinking that they can do what we do but why should they bother since we are doing it for them?

Well, with that line of thinking, why would anyone bother to do anything further for anyone else if they were not going to be evenly recompensed for their time? It is an insult, not only to a person’s intelligence, but also to their Spirit. It is an insult to believe that the person who does anything for someone else is going to be willing to do more when their time is not valued, and it is going to be an insult to anyone who takes pride in their work and for whom what they do matters. It is an insult beyond anything imaginable when we do something for other people and when our work is not appreciated and more, there is no energetic exchange for the work done. When we choose to believe that what we do is more important than what another person does and that person is helping you with your dreams, and you decide that you do not need to trade energies with them that are positive, MANY things can and do happen. It is at this point that people either take it out on the other person by not only no longer doing what they did for them, or worse – they “undo” the good by chasing it with vengeance.

We create our own Karma when we choose who is doing good by us and who is, by our own definition, doing nothing at all and when we choose to act on it, or not act on it, behaving as though we could do this all on our own. The last thing that anyone wants to believe is that on one hand our work in undervalued, and on the other hand, in the thoughts that would be those in the Karma creator’s head, that we can do just fine without their help. And this is not illegal, but it is immoral and unethical. To believe that someone else’s time is not valuable just because they happen to be happy doing what they do is WRONG. Lots of people are happy doing what they do because they are doing what they want to do AND being compensated for it. This is what is called an even exchange of energies.

How can anyone POSSIBLY think that to have someone else do them a favor is somehow the joy -to have been asked….?? HOW? That may happen, but it will only happen one time. No one I know likes to work for a pat on the back. Eventually, and no matter what, those who we decide whose work is valuable versus who we think is valuable and can live without compensation…yeah…those are two very different primates…one primate is funny and behaves like it and the other is primal and angry….think about it.

When we value a person but not their work it creates resentment and people get angry.

The Other Side of the Coin

When someone’s work is valued and people take notice, we find that in that value is the seed of trust, of Love, of wanting to be part of the bigger energy that is the All That Is. When we choose to recompense that same level of energy to others, that also shows. It shows not only in the work they do for us after we have chosen to not give them their just due, but more, it also shows in the way that they treat themselves. It makes a person feel like they are not valued for the things that they do, and when we expect that they will do it just because we expect them to, this is where the resentment begins.

When we think that who we are is enough to make a person treat us fairly is where the onus begins on our part. There are a whole lot of people for whom I do a whole lot for, and most of those people are grateful and almost all of them somehow compensate me for my time and my talents – and these are talents that not a lot of people can claim to and no, they are not of the Spiritual but of the actual means, meaning that my work with words and pictures is some of the best around, or so I have heard.

Yet, there are those few smaller companies for which I have done a WHOLE LOT for and who think that giving a person no choice in the compensatory energies is somehow okay.

No. No it is not.

.Other peoples’ time and talents are valuable to them. People charge real money and expect an even exchange of energies for the good work that they do. When that does not happen, resentment becomes huge and the drive behind the action becomes the dive that the person who needs to be compensated becomes easier to delve into, and that is a very hard place to be for a person. I know this animal, because I am this animal, and it is one thing to be rabidly on fire for the work that we each do…

…yet it is quite another beast to think that what we do on either side of the energy is somehow not as important for the person it was done for as it was for us and more, as it was for us to be finally recognized for it.

I Love You All

We do ANY kind of wedding ceremony
…even that of the last minute Shotgun variety
(No firearms required)

Cheap-Ass Tip : You can Fake it if YOU Make it !

Affordable Wedding Tip…Perfect weddings can also be Affordable Weddings

Every Bride to Be dreams of the perfect wedding, and almost never does  the thought in her head or do the words “Perfect Wedding” and “Affordable Wedding” ever thought of as one and the same.

If there is one thing that irritates any person planning a wedding it is the thought that there must be an exorbitant amount of money spent on the entirety of the whole thing. This is not the truth. An affordable wedding does not automatically mean that the event will somehow be way, way “ghettofied.” Such is not the case. There are a whole lot of different ways to save money for your big day and not all of them are cheap-ass to the point that your guests can see just how cheap-ass you really went with your own wedding.

The truth is that there is not a bride on the planet whose last name does not start with “K” and end with “ardashian” who would not love to be able to have an affordable wedding that will also be her dream wedding. With a lot of creativity, a few friends who are willing to help, family members who can offer accommodations, etc., etc., your affordable wedding can rival the most inspired and creative and yes – expensive – weddings anyone has even known about.

You do not have to be a “coupon bride,” but it does help, and the truth is that no one is going to look down on you or think of you as being a cheap-ass, and even more than that, the truth, too, is that unless someone else other than you is willing to foot the bill for whatever it is that they are suggesting (but most certainly are NOT going to offer to pay for…I PROMISE), they need to shut the hell up and let you do your thing already. (After all, you are a big girl who managed to get to the point in your life where a fully grown adult male…or female…proposed to you…that means that you are likely wearing your proverbial “big-girl panties.”)

Having an affordable wedding is not impossible. It really only takes some planning and some creativity and sometimes a little bit of elbow grease, but there really is not a whole lot standing in the way of any bride-to-be to have her dream wedding as long as she is willing to put some time in for research for perusing the internet for sites like her local freecycle, for clipping mad coupons on Sunday (Michael’s Arts and Crafts stores usually have a nationwide weekly ad that offers up to 40% or 50% of the price of one item- and usually it is the most expensive item you are purchasing), for whom it is not that big of a deal to go to yard sales and garage sales, to the thrift store, realizing that there is a whole lot of magic that can happen with some baubles and beads and a can of spray paint…and let us NOT forget about your auntie’s yard for all of those flowers!  

Again…no reason any marrying couple cannot have the most beautiful AND affordable wedding that they and those they love can create…takes a little time, patience and a LOT of creativity, but it is totally possible to do it! 

Happy Nuttiness !!!

Reverend Roxanne K. Cottell is a Southern California Native with Hawaiian Roots and a Penchant for all things hula and all things rock and roll. If what you are looking for is a whole lot of fun and not a lot of drama for you and your guests, Rev. Roxie and her Minions can help you come up with the most affordable wedding that you can all think of…and she can even get an actual ROCK BAND to your nuptials that DOESN’T SUCK !!! You can hit her up by sending an email to her. Please visit her website…and of course – there is a page in her site that is all about AFFORDABLE WEDDINGS THAT DO NOT SUCK !

The Church of The Individual

Can I get an “amen” and a “TESTIFY!” please?

Why should we not Love ourselves? There are entire populations of people who believe that it is a sin to love the skin you are in. Frankly, I think it is a gift if we can pat ourselves on the back from time to time, right?


I think that I have had about enough of the idea that really, there are certain people on this planet who seem to believe that we are not allowed to be very dearly happy with EVERYTHING that we each can call our own – all of it, no matter how very little it might seem to a lot of people, that I would be so inclined to be very happy with my broke-down lifestyle, I will tell you now that I am glad for it. I am glad for it because I know how to appreciate things that used to have value for someone else. I can see a person’s whole energy just in the way they choose to glorify their Temple. I may not always be the reigning Bell of the Ball, so to speak, but hey – I am DONE with the idea that I have to question people if they really meant what they said. Of COURSE they meant it! Duh – they SAID IT, silly. If what someone says is good, they are probably correct, but I promise, unless it was an action taken by a good person, who probably did not know the depth of their own Shadow, believe them if what is being said is about you – and believe it NO MATTER WHAT ! If they are complimenting you, say “Thank you.” Shake their hand or give them a hug. Be on your way. Take the kudos, guys – you earned it.

STOP BEING ASHAMED of being good at what you do. Stop disagreeing with people when they tell you that you did a good job on something, and start telling them how you got inspired to do whatever it was that you did that you KNOW you did good with, that you chose to stick with and to follow. We were brought up in a time when sacrifice was the highest good, but this is not that time anymore. Anymore we are learning what to do with what it is that at one time we saw as sacrifice and are now seeing as opportunities. This is the moment we all have waited for. BE INSPIRED TO TELL PEOPLE WHAT INSPIRES YOU ! This is not bragging, this is called sharing. There is nothing wrong with it. Sharing is a beautiful thing, really, and only now are we starting to do this, a lot, and I know this because if there is anything at all that is a common thing with all the people who I love the very most, it is that we all not only know how to share, but really, we WANT TO SHARE….we want to share what we know with YOU….yeah, it is weird, isn’t it?

So, go ahead – take your props – you earned it. Think about it. You got through a lot. I got through a lot. We all, everyone …all of us – got through a lot! This is the truth. Six weeks ago NOTHING WAS LIKE IT IS RIGHT NOW – THINK ABOUT IT !

Nothing today is the same as it was just a month and a half ago. An entire generation just became adults.

Think about it.

Nothing today is like it was ….three weeks ago…really…think about it….think, too, about all the crap that you have gone through and even though the crap is still crap, you are not in crap mode – you are in “go mode.” And really, there is no stopping you, at all, and again…

…you’ve earned it. You have earned the right to stand in your earned and self-righteous-but-for-a-moment pose, and as quickly realizing that as big-in-the-soul as you might be now, and no matter how much you hate the circumstances, if you thought about it in a different way, and in a way that is learning you would also see that you have been here before. You will feel a very vague familiarity that you cannot place. Then one day, usually a few days later, you are snapped into an awareness that draws you to your answers and you recognize it and it feels like home. And you realize that it is not an external feeling but a real one that grabs you by the Soul and shakes you into your own Awareness and you realize that no matter what, whatever it is that is happening, not only in your life, but collectively, you truly are not alone.

Think back to this time last year and you will know that there are new people in your life who share old memories, and with some of them there is an instant bond that is familial in nature and feels from time to time like you were brought to that one moment just for that realization of whatever it is that is bugging your brain these days.If it’s in your brain, it is meant to be pondered. If it is nagging at you, you are meant to want to know why and meant to not get the answers just handed to you. There is no magic book with answers because we all have all our own answers. It is not a time for being frivolous with anything. It is time for the changes that are waiting to take place, and if you are not paying attention at least to those things that you need to be paying attention to, then the time is NOW to wake up. WAKE UP GUYS !!

Wake up – you are needed…stop sacrificing so much…start believing that you are no longer sacrificing but rather, you are sharing and being involved, and you are being part of life, and you are learning at a lightning pace, and that no matter what any one of us thinks, even if things suck right now, you are meant to be there. And I really have a good knowledge about how sucky life can be, but I can no longer think of it as a day wasted, as long as I know that if I am somehow Loved by the Universe, and I am still here, and you all are still here, then obviously we are all here and with each other for higher reasons than we have yet to come to realize a THING about…

It really is time to pay attention ! I say it a LOT…’Auhea wale ‘ana ‘oe….

Pay attention to the patterns, to the people in those patterns of your life, and see there that also, this is you, and they are you, and you are them, or at least, your WERE them and now….nope…

…you are no longer them….you are You….

Okay….you are LEARNING that you are You…You and I…we are the same, really…all of us…we are the same…

Worthy. And To Be Loved…

I Love You All !

Love of the Unconditional Sort

Love is a strange animal…it comes in more than only one form

When I Love, I really, truly Love, for real, for good. And it is not the sort that people think it is. Through heartache and disappointment, I have learned that the way to have Love is to Be Love. It is nice to Be “in Love” with one other person, but the reality of Love in and of itself is so much grander, so much broader than only the one definition of it that seems to be the one that people chase, and the kind that we want to believe is the only sort that there is. The thinking which permeates us all is that in order to be fully present and aware of who we are is to be able to see ourselves in the energy that is that of one other person. This is not giving our Soul much credit. I believe this because in order to be able to truly see another person for who they really are, we have to be able to see through our own garbage to our very core selves. When we see ourselves for who we really are, the truth of us and everyone else in our lives becomes very apparent.

The Apparent Truth

Truth is always apparent. No matter what it is that we want to see in others, what always is there that we will always see is the truth of us that is there by us. This means that whatever it is that we can call on in others is also present in us in one of two ways – we are either the reciprocal answer in opposite to their energy, the yin to someone else’s yang, that is, or we are the exactness of their Being – a twin energy, if you will.

The energy that comes back to us is always Love, even if it hurts, it still is Love. Love comes from a place where we have been damaged, where we have been called to come forward in the Light that is our very selves, and because of the hurt there will always be times when we cannot deal with what we think is other than Love. While it is the truth that the Ego is the part of us that reminds us that we are human, it is the Soul within which tells us that we are good now, that will be good always, and that waiting around the corner for us is that nature that we seek, the internal and eternal Being who we are, and when we think about it in terms like that, there is nothing more for us to know than that truly, we are Loved and we ARE Love.

If we were not comprised of the essence that is the very Soul within, and we were not able to see for ourselves the truth that is our love within, we would be in a lot of trouble. Evidence of this being the truth is that for many generations we have opted only to see what our Egos would love and wanted only to have what we thought would  make us look better in a way that is incomprehensible to other people who are not on a mission to find out who they are in relation to the rest of the world. We are who we are, and what we learn is a personal mission for us in each lifetime we make it through. When we recognize the soul of another person and what that soul’s frequency is we feel a completion of sorts, almost as though we have somehow found our Soul’s home, and it is not in someone else, but is a likeness to that which is within another person. We know hurt because we have lived in it, and it is through the eyes and the Soul and the energy of others that we find out that we are who we are because of us, not someone else. They are the mirror. We are the reality. We each know when it is that the time to evolve has come, because we will feel it in our soul like something is missing, like we have to see what it is that is missing, and when we discover it we feel almost complete.

The reality is that we are already complete. We have been told forever and ever that it is in finding someone else on this planet who will make us complete – that this is what we require, when really, what we require is Love, period, of the unconditional sort, and there is no two other ways about it. There are a whole lot of people on this planet who have no idea that they are comprised of Love, that they were brought here for a specific reason and that it is their mission to at least live in the light that is the light of Love, of Soul and of the Spirit which lives inside of us. It is the God Nature within.

The God Nature Within

We are all born with it, the Soul within, also called The God Nature. It is this part of us that will not allow us to do more for others than we are also willing to do for us. When we do for others and it is from an egotistical desire, we know that it is fleeting, that it is not the essence that is the God Nature within us, that we are not meant to feel like we have to do more just to have it. If this is the way that you feel – that you have to work for Love – let me clue you into something now.

Never in your life have you ever had to work for someone else to love you. If you have had to beg for someone – for anyone…parents, siblings, spouse, children…ANYONE…to love you and appreciate you and not judge you, you are working only toward more disappointment. NO ONE has to work for what is so readily available to all of us.

The God Nature within would never call on us to prove that we are worthy of the Love of the Soul, because it is at the soul level that we are able to accept the insecurities, that we are able to look at, through the eyes of the Soul, the perfect nature that is Spirit. It is this part of us that knows, always, that we are lovable, that we are deserved of the greater goodness that is Love of Spirit, that we are good enough to be with ourselves and great in the eyes of Spirit. We are meant for a specific purpose in this lifetime, and if we choose to engulf ourselves with the permeating nature that is anger, resentment and hurt, the only things we will receive from that knowing is the idea that we are only good enough for those things, and those things are the only things that we will ever experience.

If we choose to see things in the manner that they are, and we accept the Shadow with the Light, we find that there comes a sweet balance to our lives and one that is not matched by much of anything else in this lifetime. When we can see with eyes which are the gauge by which the Soul’s measure is known, we also see the imperfections in ourselves, can see the thing that allows us the human ability to hurt and to be whole through that hurt. We find the saving nature that is heartache, and we find the burning white hot pain that is anger, and at that moment we can know for sure that it is all good, all meant, and that indeed there was much Love there to begin with.

Love -The Uncondition

It is not a lot to do for us to Love. We think that Love involves the arms of another person around us, in happy god-like matrimony that is mandated by the Ego and performed by someone who pairs us forever with one other person. We should already know that the one person who is crazy about us IS us, that we are whole in the manner that is “The Soul,” and that more than much else, while it is nice to have one person other than us who is nuts about us, all we really ever need is to believe that we are good enough for us to Love ourselves. Once we can Love us, there is nothing saying at that point that we are not good enough for the Love that is within us because the Love that is within us is the real kind and the kind that never fades.

When we can Love without restraint, and can give of ourselves to others in the manner that is Aloha, this is when we have discovered that all along, we were Loved, because we chose to be that Love we thought was outside of us.

It was never outside of us.
It was always right where it is right now.



These beautiful pieces of camera art can be seen by going to

Perfectly, permanently imperfect

No one will tell another person that really, it is our imperfections which make us perfect at being who we are

I say a lot about how things affect the world and the consciousness of abuse survivors. Today, though, I am addressing the entirety of us, men included, and today I am standing behind my proverbial pulpit, preaching to the masses about the reality that there is not one perfect person on this planet, that not one of us is better than anyone else, and most of all, it is high time that ALL of us decided that we will just Love who we are and to hell with what anyone else thinks.

To hell with what anyone else thinks

To hell with what others think of you, because you are as perfectly you as you can be. No matter who says what to you, and no matter who says that you are not good enough, smart enough, this or that enough, you are you because you have a purpose, and while none of us, maybe including you, really knows what that purpose is, the truth of the matter is that so long as we live WITH purpose, we can never go wrong, and that is where we will find the beauty that is our imperfect nature.

It is our imperfections which make us unique, and it is these same imperfections which make us each uniquely who we are. Why on earth would anyone want to keep up with the world’s ideal of beauty, of charisma, and more, why would you just not be in Love with all the charm that makes you, you? Why would you want to touch-up such a beautiful person, the one who lives on the inside and the one who keeps on telling you that you are somehow not good enough? Let me put it to you this way, folks – if we were all as perfect as the media clowns tell us that we should be, and to you ladies, if we were all a perfectly slim size 3, and to you men, if you all were one kinda guy, what the hell kind of world would we really be admitting to helping create if all we are is a clone to one another?

No, not a mirror to each other, because in that mirror that we are to one another there is the beauty that is the people on the other side of the reflection that we see with our Soul’s eyes. We see ourselves in other people, and my question now is only – why do you not Love You just as You imperfectly are, right now? Yeah yeah…I know…we can all admit, right now, to not being as fit as we want to be, and we can all admit to not having all the trinkets in life that we are told makes life “comfortable,” but in the mix of things and of the All That Is, we are a great big part of the Great Big All That Is!! When you think of things in that manner, it makes sense now, doesn’t it, that you would be just perfect as you are.

Without you being the you who you are, someone like me would not be able to see the Me who I am, and I Love the me who I am. The me who I am came into being because the You Who You Are was good enough to show me the part of you that is the Soul, and the You Who You Are made the time to make sure that you showed me myself by simply showing up in my life.

Yup…totally how it works….we show up in each others’ lives and suddenly we can see ourselves…it is just that simple.

The Me Who is Me and the You Who You Are are Two VERY special people, you’ll agree

It is about time that ALL humans STOPPED with the self-defeating ideas and thoughts that make the ugliness in life more prevalent and more pronounced than it needs to be. The me who I am and the you who you are are two very special people. We are special because you have in you the me that is me, and I have in me the you who you are. As confusing as that sounds, it really is simple when it is broken down into simpler terms. Very simply, I Love You as you are, because you are like I am in that you have much to offer other people just by being your very kick-ass self. We are so much more inclined to see in ourselves a deficit that we cannot see the side of us that is gorgeously meant to be the beacon that is the light which guides us to the thing that we want to be, which is just a higher purposed version of our imperfect selves.

Our imperfect selves in all of our own perfection, from the Soul of us all, cannot see what is not there within us, and since it is that I cannot see the things that my Ego wants me to use as a competitive edge against someone else then I guess the imperfections that you think you see in you are not really there because those things do not exist in me. I cannot see a way to hurt other people on purpose, and if the me who is trying to be perfect needs to be perfect, then that me is always going to only see the flaws that I have to point out to other people. If we can point out our flaws to other people and those people cannot see these flaws, then why it is that we choose to see that which is not even there but to our own eyes….well, why the hell are we worried about it?

Why the hell are we worried about it?

Why does our imperfect nature seem to be the only thing that we alone can see? If anyone else can see it, that means that we have either pointed it out to them or that they, too, have this same thing about them that you think you have about you. What is not there is just simply not there, and when we assume that it is there and we want other people to see it, too, we are only and all about the idea that who we are is meant for other people to judge, and what the hell is up with that?

I mean, really – who really wants to look like anyone on television anyway, right? Have you seen these people lately? I am not talking about what they look like in terms of what they look like, but more in terms of the idea that these people cannot hide the darkness that they are, and while I am all for vacationing on the Shadow Side of life, I am not one who prefers to stay there too long because it will wreck my perfectly imperfect tan ! No one I know likes being sad or angry, likes being mad or upset, so why is it that we are so inclined to make ourselves that way through the use of someone else’s opinion? If someone else has an opinion about us that we don’t much like, and we want to call them out on it, STOP ! I say STOP because you will not change their minds, and you will not change how they feel. The most you can do about how they feel is learn about how you really feel about you.

You cannot possibly agree with everything that the world tells you is the truth, namely not when it is that the entire world does not know who you are. If the entire world does not know who you are, then is it not also the truth that there is an entire world outside of our own smaller personal worlds that we can go out into and invade with our measure of imperfect greatness. Think about that for a minute…all the people who you know now, and all the people who you knew before now….those are not the only people on the planet, and this means that there are a LOT of other people who will…WILL feel about you the way that I want you to feel about you, and how I want you to feel about you is that you are the greatest you on two feet that you have ever heard of and known.

Don’t worry if your pants don’t fit, because it is not your ass that does the loving – it is your heart. Don’t sweat it if you are not exactly the picture of perfectly sculpted health, because even the perfectly sculpted have imperfections, too. Don’t worry if your teeth aren’t the whitest, or if you have a little bit extra around the mid-section more than you did just a few years ago. Don’t worry if you are not married to that first person you married. Don’t worry that you do not have that job you just lost. Don’t worry that you are not the you who you think is the very truest you of all, because it is the other You…the one who Loves unfailingly…it is that version of You who you should Love the most, because that is also the You who I Love the most.

The You who is unpretentious, and the you who might be a little less refined than you want to be, and the you who is impossibly hard-headed and does not want to change your mind…this is the You Who I Love because this is the You who You really are. The You who thinks that she has nothing to offer a new man, and the You who thinks that every woman on the planet will judge you because you are not like all the other guys…this is the you who I Love the most. The you who sings off key when you have had too much to drink, and the You who paints pictures when under the influence of your own anger…the You who calls me crying over something as silly as your hair won’t hold a curl, and the you who thinks that who you WERE is better than who you are becoming….this is the You who I love the most.

The You Who I Love the Most is the person who I speak to, is the person who I party with, and is the person who I would do much for, or maybe have done much for. The You who I am talking about is the You who is Me, and the You who is Me is a person who just cannot imagine why it is that I think you are the coolest you that you can be, and that me wants to know why you don’t think that way, too. The Me who is You wants to know why it is that we know each other if how you feel about you is not the way that I feel about you, and the way that I feel about you is impossible to think is somehow not okay. The me who is you wants you to know and to believe that you have nothing to be ashamed of and that who you are on the inside matters the most. When the you who is on the inside learns that the you who is on the outside is created by the you on the inside – this is when the two Yous will be able to see what I see, and the only thing that I can see in you is Me.

Be Kind to You and know now that You are the most perfect You that you can be, that who you are matters more than what you look like, and that what you look like depends on a lot on how much you love you. If you love you as much as I Love me, and I Love me a LOT, then you will know, too, that you must love you as much as I love me, because I Love You as much as I Love me…

STOP with only seeing what is so magically imperfect about you as being anything other than the gift of imperfection that is indicative of the blood that runs through your veins and makes you know that there is not one other person on this planet who can be You.

Only You can be You.
So what are you waiting for…an invitation?


From Rock Bottom to Rock Solid

A new way to think about hitting “Rock Bottom”

“…a Wise One builds their house upon rock, and when the rains fall, and floods roar, and when the winds come howling through and beat against the house, it will not fall for it is built upon a rock foundation. However, if a person reads these words and does not follow them, it is like a charlatan and a fool who chooses to build their house upon sand. When the rain falls, and the floods roar, and when the winds come beating against the house, it will fall and be destroyed for it was built upon a shaky foundation of sand…” (Matthew 7:24-27, N.A.V.)

Many people at this time in our history are both victim and witness to the terribleness that is the economy at the moment. I can sit here and blame a whole lot on the economic climate of the world right now, but I won’t. I won’t because there is already too many of us thinking that we cannot get out of this without someone else or some entity being the target of our blame, and for what, I have no idea. Since when was it always someone else’s fault or even their problem for how we feel about anything? To think that somehow our foundation that is already shaky because we chose to built it through the demands of the Ego is one truth, but to believe that somehow we are not who needs to take up the kuleana, the Soul’s responsibility and learn to not only take our lessons when they come to us but more – take it on the chin when it applies…that screams VOLUMES about a person.

Most of all…it tells us all about how we each handle having hit that place called “Rock Bottom.”

Screaming volumes about your shaky foundation in Spirit

I know the shakiness that is the unsure Soul. I know it because it was me not too many years ago. Before I embraced the Soul within me, I had to learn to embrace the fact that I was not always right, that I was playing more from what my Ego wanted instead of what my Soul needed. Once it was that I stopped with the “okay…everyone bow to me and my gifts” thinking and once it was that I began to see the importance, not only of building a solid foundation built upon the Rock that is the Soul within us each, but more, of adopting and adapting the idea that no matter what I did, tried, said…nothing was going to make things different for me if what I believed was not in right line with what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I knew a long time ago that what I was doing was not what I was meant to do. I mean, yes, I loved teaching hula, and yes, the money was really, really good, but all the while my thoughts were that of “how can I do this and still get my message across and not have to worry about charging people for this beautiful thing that I know?” and ALWAYS was the thought there with that first thought that there was no way that I would be able to do anything for free unless and until I had something else that would make up for the lost income.

Needless to say, it was a few years before my halau just sort of died out, and that is when I knew that what I was doing was not what my Soul needed me to do. While I cannot say that those kids and that halau of mine did not serve me with a whole lot, I will say that if I could have done it differently I would have, and it would have worked just fine. I know this. What I had not yet accepted was the idea that I could have made it if I had just thought more about what else it was that I could have done to implement what it was that I knew then as opposed to the things that I have learned in the interim.

In the Interim

The interim is a funny place. A lot of us think that this is where we cool our heels, and it is, but also that it is our place to just not think about the things that we think all the time. My thought about The Interim is that it is meant as a time of both rest AND reflection, that where we are when we reach The Interim is meant as our being shown to the one place that we need to be at the time and it is meant, too, to show us that we have options, that we can choose any direction we want to go in, that we have to really think about the things that we will lay as our foundation, as the rules of life by which we will choose to live, by the very sense of Integrity within us.

The Interim is that place where all of our life choices, and all of our bad choices, and all of our choices period come fully into play and hop up in our face and make us take notice of the things that we each need to give our attention to and the things that still need to be given closure to. The Interim is not the place where we end up that is also called “Rock Bottom,” because the term “Rock Bottom” is all about the foundation about which I am writing. Too many of us want to see this place called “Rock Bottom” as being the end of the road for us, as being the place where losers show up and are granted their loser button. The truth is different, at least for me, that is, in that the play on words and the idea that a foundation made of rock is the strongest one of all, is the one that you would want to build your future and your life upon, let alone your house.

Rock Bottom shows us so many things about ourselves that can be used as a tool and the most of us choose to see this place as nothing more than one more thing that has marred and scarred us, but the truth is that in the minds of the very evolved, Rock Bottom is something to build our lives upon, because Rock Bottom to a few of us rings more like the foundation that we need to rebuild ourselves.

A new way to think about being at “Rock Bottom”

You can think of it as being a brand new piece of paper upon which you will love writing your new story on, and you can think of it as being the thing that cleared away all the stuff that is not needed by you and is not useful in the idea that who we are now is not who we used to be, that what we are doing now is not the same things that we used to do, and that the way that we think about things now is more evolved and that, too, we need everything in our midst to be as evolved.

We can think about Rock Bottom as being a black eye to our ego, or we can think about it as being a new starting place for the Soul. The Soul always is ready to take us to where we need to be, and the Soul is waiting to illuminate all these things that we know is meant as our Now. We know that being at Rock Bottom can be a bad thing in our thoughts, or it can be the thing that we see as our new opportunity.

There are a whole lot of people in my life who are here for the purpose of showing me what they are no longer to me, and what they are now are simply a constant reminder of what was and what was no longer fits. It no longer fits because I have grown and have evolved and now it is my turn to take this Rock Bottom and turn it into the thing that dreams are made of. And the truth is that while it is slow in going, it is, indeed, going the way that it needs to go and it is not disappointing me at all. The things that we wish for require time, and require some effort, because even the Law of Attraction will not work if there is no energy of effort behind it making things happen for us. I know that the energy that I am in the middle of now is fraught with the hurts from the past, and that daily I am shown that those things are falling away, albeit slowly. While I am not one who likes things – at least not a whole lot of things, that is – slowly, I now know that no matter what, all the things that are meant to be, they will just be, and I know, too, that I have proven this to myself over and over again, and that just like everything else, the things that are upon me now were once a thought, were once just a vision in my head.

When our lives give to us the idea that we are at the very bottom of the barrel, it is at that point where we know that the only way to see things is through a new set of peepers, and preferably NOT the kind which wear the infamously famous rose-colored variety glasses. We are meant to see the the things in front of us as they are, and we are meant to see who we are in relation to it all. We are meant to know within ourselves that what we are looking at, no matter how ugly it is, is meant to teach us and that it is our Kuleana to make things right and our job to turn what we see into what we want to see and what lives inside of us and what makes us want to do more for ourselves. When we can do more for ourselves, the entirety of mankind somehow benefits.

When we can stop and look at the things that broke us as being the things that made us be who we are now, this is when we know that while we are still at Rock Bottom, that truly, the only way to look, the only way to go and the only thing that we should know is “up”.

And that alone gives new meaning to the term “Rock Bottom,” now doesn’t it?

Yes, it does.

Aloha ! I Love You All !

The Fire in the Belly Blog…check it out ! 

Rev. Vel-Danielle Gambrell 
Southern Louisiana
Rev. Roxanne K. Cottell
Southern California

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