Defending Love

It is not about equality as much as it is about Love…some words about equal marriage rights for all people

Marriage was not created by God. Marriage and the legalization of it between straight folks was created for property reasons and nothing else. Since it is that this is the truth, my own opinion is that everyone needs to just chill out, take a step back and realize that gays are not wanting to marry for property reasons, and neither only for equality.

They are marrying for Love more than anything else. Rather than defend my own position about this, instead, I will do what I do best and I will glorify and keep the dignity of the thing that draws any two people together and the thing that I know brings two people together for whatever reason at all is Love. It does not have to always mean that the Love between the two is romantic. Two friends who love each other like family can come together and not realize that even as the start of things was very different, it all boils down to the reason that any two people will happen upon the lives of one another. Once people can get past their own personal beliefs about what marriage is meant for, then and only then will things not be so dearly difficult to deal with.

We have all been poisoned in this country, mentally poisoned, with the hatred of things that are not familiar to us. I am sorry, but there will never come a day when this particular writer will be anything but in defense of Love – ALL FORMS OF IT AND BETWEEN WHATEVER PEOPLE IT IS BETWEEN, so bear with me and deal with it because that will not ever change. It is hurtful to make people feel like they do not have the same rights as human beings because a few unenlightened souls do not see past the idea that in their heads, being married is about which parts fit, being married is about two people getting together and who have paperwork between them that states that having sex is a given and a guarantee, that being married is anything about Love. Politics have no place in an actual marriage, and people have no right to judge others based on their own comforts and preferences.

I mean really, when you think about it…

It is no one’s business who is in love with who, and it is no one’s business if two people in love and wanting to be with each other enough will warrant them in love enough to marry. Nobody’s lives will be impacted by gay marriage, and it is because no one’s lives are impacted too greatly by straight marriage.

The reality is that this is not more than bigotry, and it is bigotry of the worst kind. Not because I love doing gay weddings, and not because a whole lot of gay men and lesbian women are very good friends of mine. I am writing this because while a whole lot of people believe that this is anything to deal with in regards to our thinking that a gay man and a straight man are NOT equals, I am here to lay it on you now that indeed, they are. Each of these two men hurt, and each get angry. Each of them pays their bills, takes their kids to school, and each of them have the same right as anyone else does to living a happy life.

I don’t understand why it is that people think they have the right to judge other people over something as simple as marriage between two people who Love one another, and all this arguing over who is legally right to be married has allowed us to stray from the idea that while this is about a bunch of people believing that no, gays and straights are not equal, because somehow there are straight men on this planet who seem to think that they and a gay will not ever be equal, and when we think further about it, it boils down, simply, the idea that there are MANY straight people who think that allowing gays to marry somehow cuts into straight peoples’ time. My question is “How?”

How is it that we can be okay with hating an entire group of people enough to make sure that the one thing that they really want is to be able to be together,legally, all while said same group of people doing the hating claim to be all about the Love? Really? For who? What club do people who Love each other have to be a part of in order to make all you fearful-of-everything-not-one-sided people see that gay marriage is NOT going to impact anyone in any way OTHER than that we will FINALLY have an entirely EQUAL SOCIETY?

Gay marriage is not only about a piece of paper, and surely it is not only about becoming equally human in the eyes of the world.

It is,very simply, about a group of people whose Love for each other being as big as that of a straight couple, and that is where the equality here counts. People who Love for real do so without blinders, without prejudice and without the thought in their heads that what other people think about them means anything when it comes to that Love between two people. No matter what anyone thinks of me after this, my position about this issue remains as it has always been.

So rather than continuing the madness of hating people who Love each other enough to marry, how about thinking about the last time that you were singled out and kept from something because of a reason that you had no control over? And no, no one turns gay…no one. There are no teen-aged people who would willingly be gay and at risk of being beaten to death by other teens. No one thinks about it that way. People want to believe that somehow, you turn gay, but you don’t. No one would volunteer to be someone else’s target.

Just like no one would volunteer to be someone else’s target, no one would choose to die unless they were already sick enough and going to.

Mind your own business. Let them marry. Love is not a sin.

Judging other people is – or did a whole lot of people who swear that book is the truth not think about that part, too?

I Love You All !!

Reverend Roxanne Cottell is the Kumu Hula and Creator of the Spiritual Hula Program for Women and the Co-Founder of Na Hula O Ka Wahine ‘Ui. She is a blogger, book authorchoreographer and Spiritual Consultant, an advocate and public speaker against domestic violence and emotional abuse, both of which she is also a survivor. If you would like information about Weddings or simply just to contact Roxanne for information about the Spiritual Hula Program for Women or information regarding private hula or Spiritual Guidance sessions with her or would like to book her for a speaking engagment please  feel free to send her an email.
(c) 2013 Roxanne K. Cottell. All Rights Reserved


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