Be Elegant, even in the heat of battle
“Nothing suffocates you more than the passing of everyday human events
Isolation is the oxygen mask you make your children breathe in to survive…”
(c) 2012 Roxanne K. Cottell. All Rights Reserved
Be Elegant, even in the heat of battle
“Nothing suffocates you more than the passing of everyday human events
Isolation is the oxygen mask you make your children breathe in to survive…”
Cry, cry, Baby…
Let us call today a very energetically strange day. Today I woke up with the thing that ate my brain for hours last night. If there is ever anything that anyone does not want to do it is go through yet another day of having someone who lives in the house with you attack you verbally, say unkind and untrue things to you about you, and tell you that basically, they hate the very sight of you at this moment. While I am sure that the person who said these things to me did as an unenlightened person will do believes that today I am still angry with them for having said what they did, I am not. I am upset, a little tiny bit hurt but outside of that I am good.
I am good because in that small exchange I was given the gift of something that I am sure I never really had for the majority of my life, and that one thing is respect. While I was growing up the running theme of how we were treated always hinged on how much we could be controlled. This is the way that I see it now. When I was a kid it was normal, and the thing is…I ain’t a kid anymore, and things we did when we were children, while some of us still do those things, the most of us are not those scared and bullied little kids anymore. We are now older, more aware Wise Ones who have become weary of the people who used to be the adults in our lives still seeing us as little kids and still treating us as though we are not going to claim the respect that is ours to have and to claim by this point in our lives.
Needless to say, over this event, I ended up in tears.
…but…again..needless to say…it will not happen again. It will not happen again because today I woke up, the first picture in my head that of a Western Diamond Back Rattlesnake, and then I heard the shells I have wrapped around my left wrist clicking together in unison as though I were to greet the day like that of the Rattlesnake, where even as it is the winter time, this snake, she still sheds her skin.
She still sheds her layers, of tears, first, of hurt and anguish and of rage and the indignities suffered for things that she never did, never was, never said, and for the first time, she was ready and willing to let it shake…rattle…and roll…
Ladies, I am speaking again to you, this time, though, is different. This time I want you all to know that at this time in your lives there is a marked change happening. You have to prepare yourselves for the things ahead of you, because whether the world wants to believe it or not, the world is returning to a more amicable way- the way of the Mother, the way of the Matriarch, of the Kahuna Ali’i Wahine among us, of the Wise Ones and of the grand and glorious Feminine Divine.
Claim your birthright, my Sisters, and stand proudly in the idea that you are here with purpose, that your life is a testament to the death and the rebirth, not of only the globe, but the entirety of our very selves. Take a look in that mirror that you have been ignoring for so long now that you realize that it was not the mirror that you were ignoring but it was the person you thought you were. There came a day when you looked into that mirror and into your own eyes and saw for the first time in a long, long time, the beauty that is there, that has always been there, and you cried.
Think for a moment about those tears and about what they did for you, and think, too, about just how big that weight was and how much was lifted from you through them. Think. Think about the way you felt right before they fell, and then about how you felt almost immediately afterward…and now realize the transformation, and think about how you wished and hoped that something would change, and while you meant on the outside, it was on the inside that it took place, where it most needed to happen.
Now think about that before crying part…now after…now really think about how you felt that made you cry, and how now, you are empowered by that time you had, in a mess of tears, at any time at all over the last twelve months, and about what it was that you cried about, and what it was that you cried about recently, and know now that you have grown. You have grown because what bothered you six months ago is now smaller, somehow, but what bothered you recently had to do with stuff about your blood relations and yes, while it was also in the daily horoscopes – we all read them – this is not about the things that happened generally.
No no, folks…this is meant to make you think on your own singular and personal level, and I promise you that if you have not yet cried, you will be crying…soon…here we go…
Think about what made you cry yesterday. I know EXACTLY what it was, and it was spawned by a blood tie – a close blood tie – and it had…HAD…the flavor of “never speaking to that guy again, ever…” Yet, before I made the choice to walk away, send a text, take a walk, create something, and then decide to go in to my Sacred Space, that really was the thought, but it was not the thought about the guy, really, but more, about the way that I have allowed people to treat me for the entirety of my life.
Then I woke up to the sun streaming through the window, hitting me in the face and not bothering me at all. It just made me wake up…and by wake up, I mean in a lot more ways than only one.
Expect Miracles. For every tear you have cried, and every person who is no longer in your life, and every little thing that you have cried about, expect a Miracle. Expect a Miracle because I know your heart cannot NOT expect one…you have been through so much, and you should be proud of yourself, because you did it! You made it. I don’t know what it was that you did, or made it from, but I know it. I feel it collectively.
Collectively we made choices, and collectively we looked at our demons and told them to go f*ck themselves, and collectively we assigned a newness to this ….collectively felt stuff….that we are all in the middle of. We all are in Process, at this moment in time, and it is awesome. The things that should have broken us did not. The things that made us afraid, do not make us tremble, and it is because of that blessed numbness which comes with so much pain and collective anguish.
To my Tribe, globally, my global Sisters, collectively, you are…we are..the very example of Mother Earth. STOP pining for what is not there. You have grown.
Y’all ain’t little girls anymore. Put on your big girl panties…walk around in them and see how it feels…haha!
Now…how’s THAT for a visual?? *Laughing hysterically*
I Love You All !
It’s is time to wake up, Ladies…seriously…
I want to tell you a little story…
So, last night I am doing what I do usually on that night…or Tuesday night…or Thursday night…and I walk in the door, say hello, and not but a few minutes later…BANG ! Fireworks, and believe me when I say that there was nothing more that me and my Catty Little Ego wanted to do more than tear this …child…even as she is a fully physically grown adult…a new okole puka.
We shall say that because of this particular and certain company that I keep, there are certain ways of being that are no longer appropriate to employ when dealing with such…people…specifically women people…who are choosing to be stuck in the vibration of their own lower energies. I won’t lie – the truth is that all of the slamming of the doors and the stomping of the feet reminded me of my own self when in certain situations – not but just a year ago, even, but at the same time was pretty impressed with myself in that I said nothing more than what needed to be said. If I chose to let Ego be the “bitch in charge,” there would be BIG problems…big big BIG problems, and well…there is enough of that going on already as it is, enough of the drama caused by women in life, period. It makes me angry to know that in this day and age there is a majority of women who are stuck in the idea that they have to be loud and angry to get their point across, that they have to make a scene to take a truly awesomely chick-ish stand.
Ummm…nope…you don’t…and it would serve you well to NOT have a tantrum, because tantrums are for children, and women raise children…we are not children. I know that there are a lot of you reading this right now who can think of one such person who really, dearly, absolutely needs to do the rest of us chicks a big fat favor and STOP with the antics and the empty-calorie type sugary behavior, because the only thing they are doing is making themselves (and the rest of us, to a point) look really, really bad…or maybe really, really good…I do not know and I really cannot say that I care much beyond the end of this blog post! So, today’s blog, today’s thought, today’s Mana’o is simply for the majority populace of women on the planet to STOP with the nonsense.
Truly, this is for the guys !!
A Message, not from the Divine, but from me…Reverend Roxie…
You know who you are, those of you who are reading this and thinking to yourselves that you know a lot of women who are just like the one I gave a short description of, and that is her description. This child is all over the place in terms of her energy. I see it all over her – the fear, the confusion, the things that scare the hell out of her, and when I first met her I wanted to try to get to her core. At one time thought I may have. I figured that she might take some sort of Divine Guidance from what it was that was imparted to her. This is a child who is a woman’s physical self and who has no idea the difference between what it means to be powerful and what it means to be powerfully and egotistically arrogant – and yes, I can say that because I was that. While I try hard not to judge, people like this one person in particular tend to make that part of my shadow side…the one to whom only the vision of a Shark and the word “Ka’ahupahau” come to mind.
While I would love to sit here and lambaste her specifically, I will not, because what she and those like her need is not only to be chewed out, not only to be given yet another reason and another person to tell her what is wrong with her (even though her entirety of being seems to be that of striking out at others first to hurt them and protect her Self…good try, Cookie…it will take more than you and your mouth, honey…first clue you should have is to know thy opponent…and all you know is my name, princess…) and really, what she needs is Mama Energy, not only from within her Self, but from the world at large. In fact, there are a LOT of women on this planet – women even 20 or 30 years my senior…and I am gonna be 43 in three months – who BADLY need to check themselves before they further wreck themselves…yeesh!
Too many of us believe that the world of men is the enemy, but it isn’t. Men are just being men, and we think we are being women when we believe that we can tell them what to do and that they will bend to our every whim. I am sorry, ladies, but that is not a man – that is but a doormat. What you want in your life are MEN, not little boys, not a doormat who will cater to your every wish because your every wish is not your truth, is not the depth and neither the very Desires of your Soul. If what you want is a doormat, go to Lowes. You want men to treat you like you are equal to them but you want them to be equally subservient as much as you like to think of yourselves as being equal in terms of who is in charge. NO ONE is in charge, because we share space with the men of the planet, and if the men in your life are treating you with disrespect you really need to think about what it is that you are going to do about it or should already have done about it LONG before you find yourselves in a situation which you think you have control of. Do not forget that EVERYONE in our lives is a mirror, and you need to think about what your mirrors are telling you. My mirrors, Cookie Loves, are telling me wonderfully magnificent things that are the very truth of my very Divine Feminine Nature…you should experience this, but you cannot see past the bigness of the Ego that you think is protecting you when all it is really doing is making you look like a damned fool.
No, really….big ole dummy…
You do not like being controlled, being told what to do, being thought of as stupid, as less-than, as anything other than the Divinely and Spiritually endowed creatures that we ALL are, and you are making it a challenge for those of us who have chosen to rise above the plane of the Ego and who have chosen to walk the Way of the Goddess, have chosen to see past the fears in men that they have about women, and you have chosen to remain as you are – the very definition of what a man DOES NOT WANT in his life- in ANY capacity, and if you don’t believe me – ask one of them. They will be very honest with you if you tell them to be, and lots of you have chosen to take what they have to say as them being “stupid males” when in fact the reality is that you…YOU have made it so that these men are stupid…but they are only stupid around YOU !!! You want to play a man as though he is some how foolish enough to lower himself to your energies, and then you get mad at them all when you find yourselves used like so many times in the past.
The company which you keep tells a lot about who you are, and you want to not see yourselves in the people who you pass judgement on, the people who have tried to help you, and you behave as though you are owed that help. You are not owed and neither entitled a thing, ever…it takes work to be the Goddess you are meant to be…I know this personally. It is a daily practice for me and is the thing by which I earn my keep. Y’all need to reach deep inside and see where it is that your own Goddess cries and deal with her, not with the people who you think are there and in servitude to YOU! Until you stop thinking that really you are somehow not good enough for the world and until you learn that there is a difference between being good enough and being good at being you, you will NEVER realize the Goddess Path because no Goddess is an egotistical being. No Woman who is a True Goddess needs anyone to fear her. A Goddess is as a Goddess does, and right now there are a lot of you pandering to the Goddess of Poor Lil’ Ole Me…please, ladies…quit already!
Y’all need to do yourselves a favor and again…check yourselves before you wreck yourselves and understand that not all men are pigs, not all men are stupid, are out to use women, and that you do not have the right to think of them in such a manner and expect them to act as though the ground upon which you stand is holy (even though it is…but that is for another blog post), is meant to be thought of as such…but the problem is not that THEY do not think the world of you, but more, that you truly do NOT. You see, baby girls, who you are is what you give to the world, whether you like to think so or not, and who you are is reflected in the people with whom you hang the most. You are given privilege to see inside of a man’s soul when he allows you into his life, and too many of you out there in the great big world believe what you see on television, that what the Kardashians have is somehow what you will have, too, and that you are going to find a man to give that to you.
How about this one, Cookie…how about YOU take your silly self to the nearest body of water, ponder it, realize that the person looking back at you and who is judging you the harshest IS YOU and once you can get past the reflection of the face and look deeply into the eyes of that same person staring back at you and see there just how important you really are? Why do you want to continue to take your Sacred Nature and pander it out as though somehow doing so is going to raise who you are and also make the man who you tried to make look the fool also be raised? Are you sure? Are you serious? Don’t you want better for yourself? Do you not see the special Flame that is there, that is all of the Feminine Divine and why, why, WHY are you so interested in trying to make the men in your lives look like fools when all they really want to do is see the best in you? Are you sure that a man only wants a woman for one thing? Are you sure they are not also thinking and feeling creatures and are you positive that they all cannot be trusted because silly ridiculous you went out into the great big world and decided all on your own that somehow you had more in terms of thinking power than any man you have ever known? Cookie, darling Cookies of the World…I hate to burst your egotistical bubble…but that is not how a man rolls…yeesh !
Girls it is time, NOW, to NO LONGER BE this egotistical bunch of fools who are more inclined to use that magical body of yours to get yourselves in situations that are fun as hell, but are fun as hell at a price that cannot be tabulated in numbers unless we are talking about the number of angry tears that you have cried and will still cry because you seem to think you know it all. And honey, baby girl, I promise you this much – if you think you know better than others, and you believe that saying anything that you thought might be hurtful and scathing to someone else who shares that gender with you – you need to think again. Women like me are not “one in a million,” but rather and always and will remain to be “once in a lifetime,” and the men who are in the lives of women like me, like the women with whom I hang and with the ones who have a damned clue about the way that the world works IN OUR FAVOR is simply NOT something that you can just have- the men in the lives of women like me are NOT clueless and it is evidenced by the fact that I am..we are… in their lives. (Again…men are not stupid and I am living proof of it)
You have to work for it, and by my own observation, at least one person who immediately comes to mind, that child and those like her will continue to stomp their feet, raise their hell, try hard to make women like me look the fool, but they can’t. They can’t because they cannot think past the idea that who we are is SO far removed from what they think we are that they are not bothering to see that the problem is not women like me, not women with a clue, never the men in our lives, but lil’ ole them in their lil’ ole lives having their lil’ ole tantrums and making lil’ ole themselves look that much more “lil'” and “ole…”
Take a break from being like Shakespeare’s Shrew and try a little more to be your damned true selves. You will find out that things are easier when YOU make them that way by NOT having a tantrum and by NOT behaving like a 5 year old on a mission for a cookie…and to all of the “Cookies” out there who have a problem with what I have said here Know NOW that my words are meant to be the clue that you all need, at least a small part of the bigger clue, and that if you want to know how to no longer make a scene to take your stand, I am always available…
…and yeah, Cookie…I am VERY good at throwing around the Divine Feminine Light Within…you know the same men I do, at least one of them, and he would tell you that if there is one chick who will leave her impression without saying a word, the one who a whole lot of men love to watch walk away (but truly never leave permanently)…well, just ask him…
He won’t lie to ya…I Promise…but I hope you can handle what he says, because he earned the right as a man to have his say so, and you and women like you need to “get it” in terms of what is Divine and Feminine, and what is just yet another fine example of what can happen if you choose to pander your souls out like so many like you did…and still do…wanna know how to do that? Follow my lead and I will show you the way.
To the rest of you, Know that it is never Goddess energy that is angry unless it is an angry Goddess which you are calling on for help…rather, it is but the Ego within…the Mama Energy within which prompted me to have the thought in my head that my 14 year old daughter has more in terms of Goddess Energy than, sadly, do many, many 21 year olds…just sayn’
I LOVE YOU ALL !
Okay, so yesterday was Christmas, and normally it is not like me to be away from the people who happen upon my Aunt Bernadette’s house on Christmas Day. Normally my little cousin Drew is there and normally my other little cousin Micah is there but this year, and I am very, very grateful to have seen her, it was Kisha, and always Kisha and I have been Spirit Sisters. It is my own thinking that she was brought into this lifetime for me to have more than only one younger sibling. The same goes for both Drew and Micah. We have that Soul Matched energy of Siblingship, and it is the grandest thing in the world to me.
What else is no secret is that I can only really deal with a lot of people with whom I share DNA for VERY limited amounts of time. I don’t know why this is the truth of me but it is the very and dearest truth of me. Perhaps it is Karmic. Perhaps it is my own fault for not trusting a whole lot of people because a whole lot of people, I realize and accept now, have left me. I have been abandoned by people, or at least that is what it feels like to me, many, many times in my lifetime. Yet, yesterday, as I sat meditating on the bridge in my aunt’s backyard, right there with my oldest child, Jeremy, and his Spirit Twin, A.J., and after I had recited the blessing for whom I was sent there to (because I really was NOT wanting to do anything or go anywhere yesterday …) recite blessings for, I was given a vision, and it was a grand vision that has more than only that one part to it. There is more – lots more – but I have to wait for them…
Many people there yesterday thought that I would be completely and totally drunk, but that did not happen. What happened instead was that I was shown who I am, shown that all the things that have crossed through my mind and all those energies and everything else that has culminated this year of 2012 was meant, was with purpose and yes, indeed, guys, it was meant to throw us out of our comfort zones because that is, more often than not, the way that manifestation and change just is…we always get what we need, what we ask for and we are never really sure how it is all gonna come our way. I know that I am pretty scared, but in a “OMG the BABY IS ON ITS WAY RIGHT NOW!” sorta way, and well, there is not a lot that any of us can do about it, because it is happening to all of us, right at this moment, and the texts and the emails and the chats that I have been working on this morning already tell me that I am not alone in what I was shown.
So, today, guys, I am hoping to give you all these words from Spirit that may or may not comfort you, may or may not give you peace, and may or may not be just what it is that gives you confirmation, gives you a reason to look back, even if only for a moment, and see just where you have been, just this past year of 2012.
Without further ado…here is a message that I am sure we are all waiting to have as ours…do understand, too, that yes, this is my writing but that no, this is not my message. This is a message for the collective soul of us, by the collective Soul of the All that Is…
We all need to stop worrying about what we think we are going to lose. We all need to stop the emotional hoarding, need to stop and smell the roses (or the plumerias) and we need to take a deeper look at who we each are WITHOUT the people in our lives, WITHOUT the people who brought us pain, and we need to see just how far we have come and how their influence has shaped our FEARS. We have held on to these same fearS for so long – and no matter how it …the fear…has manifested itself, it chose to do so these last few days. In and of itself, and whether we all believe it or not, the fear that we have held onto for so long that has recently manifested itself in whatever way it has is there to teach us WHO WE ARE NOT ANYMORE. If you thought for any amount of time that you are JUST what the mirror that you stare at everyday and JUST comprised of that big fat ego of yours, think again. YOU ARE NO LONGER THAT WHICH YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE…so Merry Late Christmas for that!
WE ALL need to STOP THE RUSH TO JUDGMENT, because none of us likes being judged for what and who we are not. We all know that there has been a GIGANTIC change in all of us, both independently as well as collectively, and we have taken too much time to see what the other person and the other people in our lives are NOT. Now we have to do what we can to really think about not just who they are not, but who they are no longer to us. While there was a whole lot revealed to me on that bridge last night, the one thing that stood out the most is that we have fueled our lives in every fashion up to this point from the Ego’s point of view and have not, at least a lot of us, chosen to learn to see with our Sprit’s Eyes.
We each NEED BADLY TO LEARN TO SEE FROM Our Spirit’s Eyes, because what we see with those very eyes and what our Soul KNOWS what it is looking at ALL THE TIME IS THE TRUTH OF US- and we cannot “do” anything to make it be otherwise, because that which we think we are avoiding we are really only putting off, and what we are putting off that comes back to us over and over again is somehow needed, and it is our own human failing as finite bodies that makes us believe that who others are is somehow not a reflection on who we really are. Let me tell you one thing is absolute and sure – all those people who have gone out of your lives, and all those situations, and everything that is no longer there – ALL OF IT AND ALL OF THEM are no longer there because their purpose in our lives is met. To keep it all up in trying to NOT let go is preposterous because we will be wasting our good loving energy on things and situations and people who will continue to no longer be purposeful and instead who will become energy vampires, stealing our good energy from us so that they can make it through their lives.
There is a VERY REAL feel to the energies right now of UNCERTAINTY, and this is because we are all UNCERTAIN about what it is that we see, feel and know, and we are uncertain about it because we are being “cleansed”, in a way, of the toxins that brought us to this higher plane of awareness. If you want to test it out, think about who you were at this time last year and who you are this year and ask yourself if you like who you are now or who you were then. I am telling you that I am very happy with the new and improved version of Me. Happy because this me is stronger, this me is a lot more wily than I was, and this me refuses to suffer fools lightly. This is what I asked for. This is what I wanted. This is who I Am, and this is who I refuse to not be anymore.
YES!! Whatever it is that you see, that you keep seeing, that has bothered you, scared you, enthralled you…whatever…the answer is “YES” and the heavens tell me through the ringing in my ears that yes, it is fine…all systems go…so go for it…
Other than that …carry on, because regardless of what any one of us thinks we want, what we need is what we are being given, because what we want is so, so, so awesome that our human brains cannot think that it is possible that what is going on is real, that what is going on is permanent. Trust it when I tell you, when you are told by others, when you have that little tiny feeling in the middle of your soul that yes, this is yours, this is for you and this is gonna change your life and your way of living…that it is the very truth, not only of me, not only of you all, but us, the world of humankind, as a whole…
Yup…exciting and scary and …wow…all at one time !!
It’s a party right now, guys, complete with drunks, drama and the idea that we all have to wake up eventually…might as well wake up sooner than later is my thinking…
I Love You All !!
(And I am sure that as we get closer to the end of this year that me and Spirit are gonna have a buttload of stuff to tell you all !!!)
It is not often that I will write anything, do any kind of work at all on Christmas Morning…
…yet here I am, with this magnificent gift that I did not realize was a gift that so dearly I needed this morning. I could sit here and tell you all about the drama that was not mine that I walked right into, and I can sit here and tell you all the details of it all and hear the collective groan that would ensue.
Or, I can do what I have been compelled to since about 3 A.M. …yes, it was enough to make it so that I could not fall asleep. Yes, it stayed in my head and is still in my head and while it was already posted on my Facebook wall, at the Behest of Spirit, I am again posting this beautiful piece of writing that, until last night, I saw as only an exercise in the strengthening of my Soul Gifts.
What was not apparent last night became fully apparent this morning…
There was so much that this piece of writing that I did as an exercise in broadening my own Higher Gifts told me about me, told me about my Circles and more, told me about the idea that I am fine and safe in the Arms of God, that no matter what is happening at this point in my life that I am fine, that all is as it is meant to be, and that on all levels I need to stop, smell the roses, so to speak, look into the eyes of those with whom I spend the very most time with and see myself there, in them, if for nothing else than to know that “…indeed, child, you are well Loved…they Love you…you Know they are your Soul Tribe…I Brought Them All To You So That You Would Know…” and yes, they do Know who they are, and they Know that I love them all, each and every one of them, for simply being real, not only to me, but to their very selves.
It was the thing that I longed for the most – the sight that it would take for me to Know, to See, that I am them, they are me, we are Ohana, and that is not mine but is God’s because it was God Who gifted my Life with them all. While I do not, have not ever felt indebted to anyone, Namely Not God, I indeed feel very blessed, very much as though where I am right at this time in my life is where I am meant to be. Even if I do not like some of the things that I have to learn right now, I know that it is meant, that you cannot break the Cirlce, because the Circle is the Light…I Am the Light…We Are the Light…and while I make the joke of always being a traveler on the Light Fantastic, I Know now that it was never in jest that I have said it, because My Circles have proven that I have been right on it, all along, with the idea that my Circles are what keep me safe, happy and secure…
To All Of You…I Love You…To those who have helped me bring myself to this point, Mahalo…you All mean so very much to me…
” My Circles…”
Roxanne K. Cottell
“I am standing in the center of a large iridescent circle of Light. I am dressed in a pale blue dress. It is long, but not flowing and not even clingy. The Darkness, the Nothingness, is an inky blackness, yet my presence and that of the Circle seem to be just enough light…light that is a pale, pale blue. It is safe and endless. I am comforted by this Light, by this Circle.
I am now the Circle, glowing with the heavenly blueness that is Peace. I surround myself around the Me who is in the Middle of the Circle. I see that my surrounding Light comforts the Me in the Middle and makes the Me in the Middle feel safe and okay with herself, right where she is at, in the Middle of that Heavenly Blue Circle.
I am the Me in the Middle cradled by the Me Who Is the Circle and I am seeing other people and their Circles, and We Are All ourselves in the Middle as much as we are the selves that surround the Me in the Middle. I see that there are those with whom I have formed close and seemingly unbreakable bonds and it is never spoken nor assumed our places in the Circles that are each others’ lives. I find that that whose Circles are most like mine are not the same color at all but we are all of the same Soul Frequency.
I am now looking at my own Circle from the outside, and I find that I am not able to look away because I am amazed at what I see there, and I know that what I see is that my Circle is well-lit and indestructible – Light cannot be destroyed…ever.
It can only expand, grow bigger, and illuminate..
I Love You All !!
“Humankind has not woven the Web of Life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect…”
(Chief Seattle, circa 1854)
I had a hard time falling asleep last night. Things happened that illuminated for me the bigness of everything happening in my life right now, and in a moment’s silence, I felt the contrasting difference between what is real to me, what is not real to me, and more than that, who are the most important people to me. So, with this post, I want it to be known that yes, indeed, this is a grand and beautiful message from Spirit, but it contains things within it which are all my own, and indeed, it is a message that dearly, we all need to have and to Know, because it is a message of great Love, and, too, has contained in it the words of the Kuleana that belongs to each of us.
Do Not Shun Your Kuleana because very simply, it is a gift
“Kuleana” is the Hawaiian word for “responsibility.” There are many of us who, even now, at this time in our history, refuse to believe that we created the mess that we now see, and there are many more of us who believe that what we see in front of us is not able to be corrected. I promise you, my family, that it is able to be remedied, able to be made right, able to be “all pono” and as it should be. We need to get involved in a big way, beginning Now. These are not my words, but that of Spirit, that of the collective heartbeat that was once the collective and mournful heartache of the Grander Collective Soul.
We chose to rob ourselves of the goodness that we are. For many lifetimes we shunned our own gentle nature, and it has cost us more than we know it has, but just as together we made a mess of things, so, too, will it be together that we will repair them. It will take us time and it will take us working together, but more than that, it will take every ounce of Love within us to make things right again, to make ourselves a whole Tribe and more than anything right now we all need dearly to pay strict attention to the very desires of our scarred and battered hearts. We need to convene on the Soul Level. We need to be with each other, not just physically, but more importantly, through our Souls. We need to forge a collective effort to ho’oponopono and make right that which has yet to even itself out, so to speak. We need to make things okay for us all again, and the way that we do that is to simply follow the Path mapped out by our Hearts and our Souls and follow it…follow it all the way to the place within where the monsters can no longer get to you, to the place where the fear is not there, where it is that comfort reigns and most of all, where it is that we Love.
…and now, a word from the Ultimate Sponsor…
“…take heed, take heed to these words, Na Mamo, the Cherished Ones, the Children of Spirit that You all Are. Do you not know how truly Divine you are? Are you not aware of the Love that you have to offer, that you are meant to share with the entirety of the Global Ohana, of the Soul Tribe that you all are? There is not a whole lot that any of you can do that I will not see as a blessing, as a part of the grander Peace that you are a big part of.
It is a beautiful thing to see You all as you are…Blessed…Divine…Sacred…Uniquely Important…You each are meant to Love one another, and while it is that for many, many lifetimes you have chosen war over peace, your Collective Soul has cried out, has given you all much to Learn of one another, and the thing that you learned is the opposite of Love, is the thing that has shed Light on that which makes you different from one another…
You have been taught by your living that you are meant to compete with one another, that you are meant to see that which keeps you all apart, but in the time that you were each busy learning what you are not, there was a part of you each that could feel the Divine, could see within the darkness, that could be looked at and could be looked at through the very eyes of the Soul…could be felt in the heart of Spirit…could be seen with your collective sight…through it all, you managed to bleed out the things that no longer were of good service or good purpose, not in Life, but in your own singular Lives, and you have felt the sting of that which is no longer there for you…you must know that that which hurt you was not “there for You,” but was meant only to teach you who and what you are not.
You are not a warring Tribe, for you were all created through Love, through the Love that is within for all of Na Mamo, and All of You Are Na Mamo, truly are the Cherished Ones, for it was from the collective mele a ka pu’uwai…the collective song of emotions of the heart that the very entirety of mankind has chosen at this time to come together, and you have chosen to come together at this time to help heal the wounds that so many are still keeping with them. This does not make you safe, the idea that remembering only the hurt that you went through is enough to keep you out of harm’s way…what you went through was meant to teach you, to make you more aware of who you really are, and in the manner which I felt you all would, you all thought you had a better idea…
You are now seeing the grander scheme of things, and in those things you are able to see you, able to see the you which exists in everyman, in everywoman, in the Light of the Soul which is emanated from the beauty that is a child. It looks scary to you, because you are not used to such grand shows of beauty, not used to believing that this is what you have all created, because you all wished for it and made it so. You are the reason for the paradox, for the measure of shared Grace that you have had but a tiny feeling of, a tiny taste of, a tiny portion of. And the reason it is tiny is because you have been so afraid to see what you truly are.
You are not tiny. You are big and bright, and you fear who you are…do not be afraid. Peer into the Light that is You, that is Yours. Embrace that which you are so markedly afraid of. Be The Light. Go headlong into the Light just as much as you went straightforward into the darkness, into the shadows, and Know that you are the Perfect Example of Love, of Grace, of Hope, of Belief, of Faith, of the All that Is…
Do not fear what and who you are – embrace it. Embrace it because it is you and embrace it because it is the Gift that you each gave to yourselves – the Knowing that you are all here for the greater purpose of Ho’oponopono, of making right that which is other than right. You have made it a point to be horrid to each other, perfect strangers you were until one day you chose to no longer only see just you, no longer to see just what is not you, and you thought that it would be an easy thing to see yourself for real. You found out that no, it is not. It is not easy to see what is you, especially when the You that is real is not the same you that you thought you were. You were never the shell that your physical self tells you that you are. Your physical self is the vehicle, but the real you – that is the testament to the Love that you all hold within you. You have waited for this very perfect moment, for this time in your lives collectively to be the shared Light that you are, that you are together, that you are the very Na Mamo that you all know you are, the very Cherished Ones, the Blessed Ones….
It is within your very heart of hearts, the very collective Soul that you are most treasured. Yours is the most infinite of gifts, for it is the gift of intangibility, is the gift that is common among you, even as your lives are markedly different – you are all the same, you are all Na Mamo, you are all Precious. You are All.
You Are All.
You Are All.
You Are All.
You have each been given the gifts of one another and for generations have believed that there was more, but how could there be more when you are all there is? How can there be more when what you all are is infinite, is the very epitome of Aloha, is the reason that you have been brought to this lifetime? You are all so very marvelous, are such perfect examples of the Love that is within, that it is a befuddlement that you cannot see your own Greatness, your own Ability, Your Very Own.
Take heed, Na Mamo, Cherished Ones, that this is the time in your own history that you must…MUST be in the company of those whose lives and purpose are aligned with your own. Know that not all will have the same purpose, but that all have a duty, a Kuleana, not just to each other but to your very own selves, to be the Light, to Lead, to Honor that which is Honorable within..you must know who you are, and the only way to Know is to ponder, to ask, to believe and to honor. Honor one another. No longer is there the need to war, for war is not a measure of the Soul. You must live your life in grand shows of Love, must bother with that which seemed like it was not worth the time and the effort for it is in those smaller things that the bigger things become what they are meant to become. There is nothing that is not important in this lifetime, not for any one of you, and the time is Now to begin to call in those who share sameness with you, to make use of their gifts, as they complement your own.
You are not what you thought you were, but you are very much more than you will ever know…embrace your own Light, your own Love, and give that Light and the Love as though your lives depend on it…because most assuredly, it does…”
To all of you…
I want those of you who reside in the closeness of my very heart and soul that you are so much a grander part of the thing you see as your life, so much more than you know, and I see it. I see all of it.
More than that, I want you all to know that what I see there is a work in progress and that we are all in this together…Know now that you are priceless, that your value to me is much more than all the treasures that this world holds, and that we are the shared Light.
May your day be merry and bright…may you know the truth that is yours…may you always Believe in that which seems so very unbelievable that rather than deny it, you ponder it.
This is the very heart, Soul, Kuleana of Na Mamo…
We are all Na Mamo…we are all The Cherished Ones…
Mele Kalikimaka e Hauoli Makahiki Hou…Merry Christmas and Happy New Year…
Most of the time, we Believe what is not our own Truth
The most of society in America prides itself on our Constitutional rights. We have the right to do as we please here in this country, and one of those things that we carry strongly within us is our Right to Be Who We Are and to make no apologies for it. We also carry with us each the pounding and sometimes arrogant belief that singly we all believe the same things. Yet the sort of belief that I am talking about at this time has nothing to do with what a person’s religious beliefs are and everything to do with what we each believe about ourselves.
Beliefs about ourselves are given to us
*Sigh*…I hate admitting it, but up until recently I was willing to believe that what others said to me and about me were the truth. I mean, in my thinking, how could what they said ( and some still say) not be the truth of me? How could it be wrong that they see me upset and tell me that I am gonna “go off,” and how could it be wrong that I am way too sensitive to handle some information and how can they be wrong when they are watching me be the way that they say I am?
Trust me. They were wrong. While it is that for the majority of my life I have been quietly labeled as being “The Black Sheep,” and while I know now what I think I have always known – that I am NOT “The Black Sheep” but rather and have always been more akin to the Canis Femina – the Lone Wolf – it still did not, for a lot of years, take away the sting brought to me by the opinions of others. It took me a long time to not wear that coat of inky blankness and trade it for the awesomeness that comes with the knowledge that you are quite unique, that you are unlike anyone else, that what you have is something that no one else does (and shouldn’t)…it took me a lot of years to come to the conclusion that while these people with whom I share DNA and memories with are allowed to have that opinion of me, I do not have to have it, do not have to keep it, wear it, be it because I am not whatever it is that for many years I was assumed as being.
What we choose to believe about ourselves is ours alone, and we would be remiss to not take a closer look at the things that hurt us and question if whether or not we care about what anyone else thinks of us (unless of course you have gone plum nutty and decided that they are correct about you). For a long, long time, I cared about what those who I share genes with thought of me, to the point of tears, the point where I would be crippled with the idea that I had to be what someone else’s version of “perfect” was, and when the time came – recently, even – and I was presented with these same issues brought by the same people who had presented them to me to begin with, I stopped myself from becoming angry, from weakening me to the point where I would be in tears because to me, the idea that I had done what I thought I should have was not enough no longer was good enough for me. I decided to let loose on those people with a Christic energy that screamed to them that they hurt me, that they were part of the reason that I was such a wreck and that what they said about me that I heard as a young child stuck with me and helped shape me to become who I am now.
While who I am now is no where near that blubbering wash of tears and heartache and hurt pride, their words and their opinion of me did not stop hurting me until I was able to form a new thought, not about what they said about me, but what I thought about me.
What we think about who we are totally matters
Women in particular have been raised to believe that we are dependent upon any man’s opinion of us. If I went by the opinion of “any man” I would be right where I do not want to be, which is as some object, as a nonhuman, as a thing, if you will.
Humans need to stop trying so hard to tell other people who they are, and singularly we need to create who we are and not live in the things and ways of being that other people tell us we are. For a very long time I believed that I was not as lovable as I knew I was, and that hurt. That thinking stretched out into my life and dictated all that I did for a very long time. It was not until I was given a new thought to think about myself that I was inclined to stretch, inclined to see if what I thought of me was more truth than what the old thoughts placed by others were. When I thought about it from my own point of view, I found out that I am every bit as smart, brilliant, beautiful, funny, strong, morally upstanding…all the good things we each strive for…and more. When I chose to accept that my own DNA sharers had a different belief and that I would not be the one who would be able to change that about me with them, it made all the difference in the world.
It made me know that I was lovable, and my Soul Tribe proves it to me, and I don’t even have to try to get them to accept me – they Love Me as this Me. It made me accept that I am good at the things that are uniquely mine. It made me see the truth of me as my Soul Tribe sees it, and no matter what anyone else thinks, I LOVE me. I do. I love who I am. I believe that whatever it is that I have to go through right now is temporary and that it is not God telling me that I am somehow not acceptable to anyone.
Just because someone else tells you and keeps telling you that you are not good enough for them, it does not mean that you cannot or should not be good enough for YOU!! YOU are the most important piece of the puzzle of your life, and how you feel is yours alone – not theirs. There is no permission that you need to be you, and if you try too hard to continue to fit yourself into an old thought about you then you will continue, too, to be unhappy, to feel like you somehow just do not fit in, and the truth will be that you do NOT fit in, because you will be trying NOT to fit in with your Self.
No one else but You HAS TO live with you, and as long as you continue to believe what other people are saying about you that is not healthy and will not cause you to at least question their ideal of you, you will not only continue to live with this you, but you will also be inviting those people to live with you in your head, too. They will continue to be the very thing that guides your every thought, and they will be all that they have been, all this time, and you will keep on hurting, and it will not be because of the wrongness of thought they have of you, but the very idea that you keep believing it.
Today decide to give yourself the gift of Belief in who you are. You are not wrong for being You – no one is.
In fact, you never were wrong about you…but they all were, and now you need badly to open that present for you that is from you, and that is the gift of believing something else about you.
This is not to say that you cannot believe the good things that these people say…I will admit to the fact that ALL of them have told me what an amazing writer I am, how creative and uniquely gifted I am…and I thank them for finally seeing it, or at least part of it…it is to say, however, that no one has to do like I did and be a good little girl and accept that these people feel the way that they did and some still do. It is also to say that when such an issue comes up over and over again that it is time at that point to take a really long look at the reason why anyone would say the things that they keep on saying. It doesn’t make it the truth, but it makes it something that may be worth looking at.
I mean, come on…not one of us is perfect, but all of us can aspire to excellence, right? (Riiiight)…and how can any one of us aspire to anything that is new to us if we are not willing to take that look at who we are, fix what we believe to be the wrongs that others see, mess with it a little bit, and create it into something that is the same thing, but better?
I took my own pain, my own heartache, and turned it into something that will never, ever change..
I turned it all, with the help of certain others close to me, into Aloha, because Aloha…Love…is the greatest, purest, most potent medicine known to mankind. If we choose to treat our Soul’s ailments with Love, choose not to judge it but more to just ponder it and see where it is that fear reigns, we will see to it, too,that we have been living in a truth that is not ours.
Live Your Truth. Be Who You Are. Be, In Love. And most of all, Be at Peace with it all…
I Love You All !!
Reverend Roxanne Cottell is the Kumu Hula and Creator of the Spiritual Hula Program for Women and the Co-Founder of Na Hula O Ka Wahine ‘Ui. She is a blogger, book author, choreographer and Spiritual Adviser. If you would like information about “ROCK your NUPTIALS” Weddings or simply just to contact Roxanne for information about the Spiritual Hula Program for Women or information regarding private hula or Spiritual Guidance sessions with her feel free to send her an email.
(c) 2012 Roxanne K. Cottell. All Rights Reserved